Monday, August 4, 2008

Freedom Fried Potaters

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Tonight is going to be an impromptu Zombie Clown Rock Band Party Night!!! So come one, come all. Starts at 9 PM (when I get off work) and we'll be playing Rock Band, drinking a variety of beverages, and watching movies provided by the Mad Scientist called "Dead Clowns" and "Dead & Deader" which are allegedly about zombies…and based on the ridiculous titles, may prove to be a good time for all. So BYOB and I'll provide the cowbell.

Yesterday was a pretty standard, dare I say, boring day. A few of us order Sam Pan Chinese food at work…so I had the Ying Yang Chicken (because it sounded gangsta…and the description was basically Chicken Cordon Bleu without the cheese) and some cream cheese wontons and rice. It was delicious of course…but the most important part is always the cookie at the end…and the Fortune Cookie of the Day read "A fond memory will soon lead to a renewed friendship…in bed." Hot, right? Luckily, I only have a few fond memories that would constitute a renewed friendship in bed…so we'll see if this happens. Wish me luck, eh?

Want to wish Happy Presidential Birthdays to possible future President, Senator Barack Obama & former pretend-President, Billy Bob Thornton ("Love Actually")!!! Happy birthday gentlemen. That'd be an interesting choice for the vice presidency. "Obama / Billy Bob in '08 - Freedom Fried Potaters..." I can see him fielding the tough questions now. "Vice President Thornton, what is your plan for the economy?" "Make it better!!! Next question. You...with the bad toupee." "What is your strategy to do that, sir?" "That's on a need to know basis...and frankly, your ass doesn't need to know. Next question. the skirt. Nice, by the way."

Preview of the Olympics? - Two-time Olympic discus champion Virgilijus Alekna encountered an unusual problem at a final pre-Beijing training session in Lithuania at the weekend -- his practice venue was covered in dog poo. Apparently, the stadium was used for a dog show earlier in the day. "Dogs were doing what animals usually do (oh yeah!), defecating and peeing (oh, not what I was thinking)" the professional bodyguard told Lithuanian daily Lietuvos Zinios. "There were lots of dogs and they have left lots of things behind ... and nobody even tried to collect them. I have no idea how can I train in such conditions ... and who would clean the discus after every throw." Imagine if it were the shot put...and he had to put it to his cheek before every throw. The discus doesn't seem that bad now, does it? Anyway, please clean up after your pets...or Virgilijus Alekna is going to hunt you down and beat you down...right after a stop in Beijing to get a whiff of the sweet smell of victory. Four days until the opening ceremony on 8/8/08. USA!!! USA!!! USA!!!

Not Just for Limp Noodle - Impotence drugs may help carry cancer-fighting drugs through the brain to treat malignant tumors. Tests in rats showed two erectile dysfunction drugs -- Schering-Plough's Levitra and Pfizer's Viagra -- helped carry a chemotherapy drug past the blood-brain barrier, the team at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles said. Rats with brain tumors lived 42 days when injected with the cancer drug adriamycin. But when they also got Levitra, known generically as vardenafil, the rats survived an average of 53 days. Levitra appeared to be more effective. So it doesn't extend...well THAT...but it can also extend your life. Is there anything they can't do? I'm a little concerned though. We spend so much time researching erectile drugs, bigger breasts, smaller backsides and hair restoration...that I'm concerned that we'll forget about things like diseases and viruses.

Well, that'll do it for today. I'm busy busy today at work. Stop on by for the party tonight. I'm gonna need a few beers after today. Have a great day everybody!!! Vote Obama / Billy Bob in '08!!!


A.P. said...

The movies may be a little late tonight, because I forgot to bring them here. And typing this is really futile, being that you are sitting right across from me and all...

Oh, and thanks for not mentioning my giant screw up with the old Sampan menu, and everyone paying almost double...

see you in the car!


$teve said... problem not mentioning that. I think we're the only ones interested in the movies anyway. :) Rock Band seems to be the big draw. See ya in the car... :)

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