Saturday, October 29, 2011

New Orleans Halloween 2010 - One Year Late

Good Morning Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, we’ve come to the eve of Halloween Weekend 2011… so I thought it was finally time to share with you my adventures from Halloween Weekend 2010 in New Orleans. Why have I not shared it before? Laziness. Okay, only partially… but I didn’t want to give you only half of the story. You see… up until a few weeks ago, I didn’t have any pictures to pair up with the events… for a series of reasons. First off, I had forgotten my camera before boarding the plane. Second, I took a few pictures with my phone… but only a handful… and they were all wiped out when I took a swim in Lake Tahoe in July with the phone in my pocket. Thirdly, Filly hadn’t sent me a copy of pictures from her camera. Fourthly, as we all know, a story without pictures… is not really a story at all & boring as hell. Therefore, after collecting pictures from Filly during our rendezvous last month… and the timing being proper, I give you… Halloween 2010. By the way, the entry was typed up in November a week after I returned… so a few things have changed since then (number one being my living in Truckee then, but now in San Francisco) but hey, we’ll get to that when the conclusion rolls around… enjoy!!!

Sent: Tuesday, November 09, 2010 2:36 PM

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

And the saga begins…

Day 1 – Thursday, October 28, 2010

As mentioned (previous entry last year), woke up at 4 AM, got ready, met my stepsister at the Reno Airport around 6 AM so that she could watch Gretchen at gratis instead of paying $70 to leave my car in the middle of the desert unattended at the airport. Don’t worry, I got her and the kids some great little things from New Orleans… but more on that later. The flight wasn’t bad at all. I basically slept on the hour long one to Vegas and woke up just in time to see the Strip, Lake Mead, Henderson and all the many spoils of my mistress. On the connector, I even got to see the Grand Canyon (but alas, no camera on hand). I also got to meet a lovely woman by the name of Aubrey… and a gentleman by the name of Mister Higgins. Mister Higgins was quiet… but I got that he was going to Mississippi to see his brother and he seemed like a real nice guy. Aubrey though, was just about the sweetest woman ever. Probably in her sixties, African-American, and was flying from LA to Mississippi for a funeral of her great aunt (she was 92). We got to chatting about family and all that… and it was just a great way to pass the time.

I met up with Filly at the airport… and was hungry… and thirsty… so our first stop was to, I kid you not, a drive-thru daiquiri place… and they were NOT skimpy on the booze either. I still have yet to find a drive-thru liquor establishment here in Truckee… but I know of a few in Reno. Still though, alcoholic slurpees with the convenience of a drive-thru. It could be huge is all I’m saying. After that, we went to the Avenues Bar & Grill near her house and I had my first taste of Ya Ga Mein, which is basically Chinese noodles… but with roast beef, chicken, sausage, peas, chopped green onions, boiled egg, and whatever else they would throw in there… and it was delicious. We also had a beer or two and enjoyed something new for this kid from Utah… being the only white boy in the whole place. Great place though. We went there a few times. I also met Filly’s roommates Vyper & Maximus (would it make you feel better if I told you those weren’t their real names?). We hung out and watched movies… and I met Filly’s coworkers at the stables… and it was just a good day.

Day 2 – Friday, October 29

This was the day that I got to know Maximus & Vyper a bit as Filly had to work… and they’re cool cats. We watched some movies, walked around the neighborhood with Pi (Filly’s pitbull & yes, named after the constant of the circumference of a circle divided by the diameter) and when they had to go to work, I hitched a ride into the French Quarter and wandered around the craziness that was Bourbon Street & Jackson Square. After a few hours of that though, I was a little tired, so I made my way back to Filly’s place by around 2 AM. Let me explain that one a bit. I was tired… because Filly’s typically sleeping schedule is the exact same hours as I usually work (8 AM to 5 PM) and we were basically on her time this week… because it was Halloween in New Orleans… so that’s the proper hours. I wasn’t used to it this first day because I was up for about 24 hours before my 4 hour nap before I was up again this day. Also… to be honest, I was wandering around New Orleans alone on a Friday night, so after a few couple of hours (and a few drinks) I was ready to save up the energy for the next day.

I just liked the design on this knock-off mountain dew...

Day 3 – Saturday, October 30

This was really the big Halloween day, as it was a Saturday… and Filly had work off due to the Krewe of Boo Parade, which is like a Mardi Gras parade… but scary. During the day, we didn’t do much… as we stayed up until about 6 AM. But about the time the sun was going down, we transformed into our costume. I as the great Waldeaux (the Big Easy version of “Where’s Waldo?”) and Filly as Rosie the Riveter. Pi also came along with his wonderful pumpkin sweater… so yes, he was Pumpkin Pi. Delicious. Now, our plans were to go to the Krewe of Boo… and we checked sites all over the worldwide web… and the info ranged from 6 PM to 9 PM for a start time… but the majority said 7 PM, so we went with that. We headed down the street to see the beginning… and we ran into some Vikings aboard their ship, which may have been a float… but they said they were with a different neighborhood one that started in a few hours. After asking around, we had just missed it apparently.

Then… we met two lovely young ladies who appeared to be lost… so I inquired, “Are you ladies looking for something?” Please keep in mind that I’m dressed as the world’s sexiest Waldeaux… and they are in regular clothing revealing a lot of their legs. “We were just trying to find the Halloween Parade.” Filly stepped in, “So are we but I think we may have missed it.” “Dang.” “Well… we were just going to try to catch up on Canal Street if you’d like to ride along with us.” By the way, this was Filly playing the role of Chick-n-Wing to hook a brutha up. “Sure, can we stop to get a drink first? We’ll buy ya one for the gas or something.” SOLD!!! Along the way, we found out they were from Houston and were here with a bunch of friends, the friends slept in while they wanted to see the city… and boy did they stumble upon two of the best tour guides the city has to offer. Long story short, we got to Canal Street… and missed it there too by about 15 minutes (apparently it DID start at 6 PM) but the ladies still wanted to hang out (they had ample opportunity to ditch us) so we gave them a ride back to where they were staying (nice place in the Quarter) and just chatted on the stoop while their friends were getting ready. Filly told me that when I would excuse myself to use the restroom, they were asking a LOT about me… and if we were a couple… and all this stuff. She was nothing but the perfect Chick-n-Wing… even getting the digits in a non-threatening way while I was away. Kudos Filly!

We went to get some pizza because… frankly their friends were taking too damn long & I was losing my buzz. We got to know each other more… and share tales of wonders at our respective homes… and then their friends showed up… and yeah, that was pretty much the end of that. We got separated in Frenchmans Street, they didn’t call the next day to go exploring (probably hung over, which was understandable) and yeah, that was that. Their loss… because we had some fun. Frenchmans Street – CRAZY!!! We did some people watching, some dancing, wandering through the quiet streets in the Quarter between Frenchmans & Bourbon… and with it being Halloween… and a little fog coming into the streetlights later in the evening, it was cool & creepy. The weather honestly couldn’t have been better during the first few days though… and was appreciated since my outfit involved long sleeves & a f**king knit cap. Bourbon Street – F**KING CRAZY!!! We didn’t hang out there much because… after a few hours of drunken idiots saying “HEY WALDO!!! I FOUND YOU!!!” it’s okay… but when it was getting into the 8th or 9th hour, I was about done. We wandered to Jackson Square, ate beignets while people watching with the Mighty Mississippi at our backs, it was really just an amazing night. I had a LOT of fun… and as usual, it didn’t even require me drinking myself into a stupor & banging some random hotties from Houston for my first ménage e trios (Though it would’ve been quite pleasurable for all three of us…)

There's something you don't see everyday...

a guy playing the banjo

"Excuse me miss... get the f**k off my car..."

Carmen Sandiego & Waldo...

seriously, they should just hook up...

...or Jessica Rabbit works too...

Day 4 – Sunday, October 31

The official Halloween and Filly had to work… because you gotta make that mother f**king money. Around nightfall, I was just about ready to head to the Quarter by bike when Vyper said that he was heading into the Quarter to do some drumming with his group, so I hitched a ride… and lo & behold, we were both headed to the same spot anyway – Voodoofest on Rue Dumaine!!! He was a drummer with the group playing the voodoo beats for the ritual dances they were doing. “Voodoo rituals? That ain’t right!” I beg to differ. See, the beats was bangin’, they were passing around bottles of rum to help “enliven the spirits within” and seriously, I was looking for albums to buy. This was held at the Voodoo Cultural Center or something… and it was awesome. People all dressed up for Halloween, people passionately chanting, even a 90+ year old Haitian voodoo priestess giving blessing out like candy… and thanks to the free rum bottles on an empty stomach, I was in the zone. Side note: The ladies seemed to like dancing around me too… maybe coincidence… maybe they just know a good thing when they see one. Stayed there for about three hours until they decided to stop, would’ve stayed longer. I got $30 for the booze and tunes towards the cause (which I think went to Haiti relief & their center).

"F**kin' voodoo magick, mon!"

After that, I decided to jaunt past Bourbon for a few minutes, then just chill at a bar somewhere off Jackson Square. Why? Because the Steelers were playing the Saints just down the street at the Superdome and I wanted to check on that… and get a few drinks as well. While there, I met a few pairs of people in outfits who also stopped in to see the game for a little bit… and then met up with them later on Frenchmans for a quick concert… but I left about 20 minutes into it because Filly had told me that she was off work & not feeling well… so then we met up, watched some X-Files episodes (I had forgotten how good it was), enjoyed some Ya Ga Mein and just had a good time to start November.

Day 5 – Monday, November 1

The next day, we met up with one of Filly’s artist friends (very cute but extremely shy) and we drove her across the river to Jefferson Parish (where Steven Seagal is a sheriff) to do some shopping at Hong Kong Groceries… and again, nothing like this in my deck of the woods… and that’s disappointing… because I could live off that stuff. Dumplings, various exotic meats, even durians (which is probably the worst smelling fruit possible for those who don’t know) and all at discount prices. Even the beverages were odd & intriguing… but just FYI, the white tea soda, not that good. Good times though… and we got back into New Orleans crossing the bridge at sunset so… here are some pictures…

Day 6 – Tuesday, November 2

This day, it basically rained all day… but I did get to meet Filly’s boyfriend Chris. For some reason, she was really worried about it… and I have no idea why… probably because she’s a chick or something. Quick story: They’ve been going out for a while… but Chris is very secretive and not trusting of others (because of his past and where he was raised). Also, he’s probably only heard nothing but amazing things about me… and that I’m technically a giant… and been friends with her for the better part of a decade… and I don’t know, maybe he was just nervous for some reason. Who knows? To help ease his reservations, Filly spent some time with him after work most days I was there… which was fine, because I was out getting drunk in the Quarter anyway. Long story short, we met, hit it off pretty much immediately, he found out all the rumors are true, they seem smitten, we had some Popeye’s chicken, drove around in his new truck, listened to hip-hop (of which we’re both educating Filly about), and just had a good time for a few hours on an otherwise just rainy day in the Big Easy. Oh… and now they have plans to come and visit me here in Tahoe next summer… and Filly’s already saving up for it. Apparently she misses the mountains & he’s never seen them… so I’d be happy to show them off.

Day 7 – November 3

And then I flew back, met up with my stepsister to get my Gretchen back, gave her & the kids some goodies from the Big Easy (little art things from Filly’s cute artist friend & beignet mix) and made it back home just in time for the first dusting of snow. Since then, I’ve just been insanely busy with work and family drama… which believe it or not, I’d rather not talk about because… it’ll just infuriate me and there’s not a whole lot I can do. Basically it just reinstates that sometimes my mom is a foolish woman & my brother is a psychotic douche… and police were involved. Fun, right? Well, on that note, have a great day everybody!!! Hope you all enjoyed this trip to New Orleans. You’ll get to see more of it again in about six months when the snow thaws…

Also... thanks to Filly, you get an added bonus of some pictures from my trip to Mardi Gras 2009... so enjoy...

Remember Sunrise?

Do NOT judge me...

And thus the story ends… and in the year since then, let’s see… Six months later, you did get to see New Orleans again for my 30th birthday cruise & Filly's cute friend is the one who gave me the world's greatest panda $teve painting. Have I not posted that yet? Maybe I will again soon. The family drama has… passed, I guess. In that we don’t really speak of it. Filly’s roommates Vyper & Maximus left shortly after because apparently they weren’t cool guys. I moved from Truckee to San Francisco about two months after this… yet still live in a National Park, just without the snow. Still no word on when Filly & her beau Chris will come out to see the mountains (oh I’ll still show them off) but their relationship is an odd one & the economy is what it is. I’ll be dressing up as Waldeaux yet again this year… since I found out about the “Where’s Waldo Flashmob Pub Crawl” tonight. That’s like the perfect combination of Halloween, booze, nerd, exploration, laziness & social gathering that I was looking for. It’s like the pub crawl was made for me… and I already had the costume. Anyway, I hope that you enjoyed the stories AND pictures now. Here are a few addition ones that were on the disc that Filly gave me from Mardi Gras too. Just thought I’d share… Have a great weekend everybody!!!

Dad's Visit to San Francisco

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Let’s see, last week I watched “Scream 4” starring the lovely Neve Campbell, the awkward couple of Cox-Arquette… and a bunch of other young people who get brutally murdered but the only one that I recognize from anything is Hayden Penetierre from “Heroes” who will forever look fourteen years old. Sidney Prescott (Campbell) is on a book tour promoting her memoirs from overcoming the brutal attacks of the first three movies when her travels take her back home to Woodsboro, where it all began. Needless to say, people start dying… and it’s as if they’re trying to “reboot” the original murder spree for a new Ghostface Killer (not Ghostface Killah, WU TANG!!!). In typical Scream fashion, it’s a very good horror flick with social undertones to the whole remake / reboot craze of Hollywood as well as the ideas of celebrity via webcasts, Twitter, Facebook & other social media. If you pay attention, it’s fairly predictable… but if you’re looking for a good scream, check it out. The Scream movies are a LOT better than most horror flicks out there… usually because they make fun of some of the clichés & improve upon them… but still keep true to the genre… because let’s face it, what’s a horror flick without somebody running up the stairs… or turning on a f**king light switch?

Later on, I hung out with J-Mo and we watched “Horrible Bosses” starring Jason Bateman, Jason Sedaikis, Charlie Day, Kevin Spacey, Jennifer Aniston, Jamie Foxx, Donald Sutherland & Colin Farrell in a comb-over. You’ve probably seen the previews about the three guys with three horrible bosses & they drunkenly decide that they should kill them… but they’re not professional killers… so they ask for help from a man called Mother F**ker Jones (Foxx). It’s actually pretty hilarious even though it didn’t shatter any box office records. Kevin Spacey plays a great a-hole boss, I wish there was more of Colin Farrell’s cokehead character but I’m sure there’ll be deleted scenes, & I WISH Jennifer Aniston would sexually harass me… but that’s another story. I would highly recommend checking this movie out for a few good laughs.

Friday night, I picked up my dad at the airport & began our male bonding weekend. We didn’t do much except split a 6-pack of Hornsby’s Crisp Apples and watch a little TV that night… but the next couple of days were pretty awesome.

Saturday, we started off by stopping by Safeway to stock up on adult beverages & snacks, then took the bus to Joe’s Crab Shack near Fisherman’s Wharf. The food was pretty good, we just had appetizers of crab stuffed mushrooms & crab nachos, with a pitcher of Hurricane. Now, my dad was a pretty big drinker in his heyday. Not really bragging or anything, just saying. Then thankfully about 7-8 years ago, he quit drinking (and it only took a pretty scary physical reaction to do it). So now, he’s kind of a lightweight like me… except I’m a little younger. He had never tried a Hurricane. Being damn near a New Orleans native, I love ‘em. He took a drink though & gave me a look. “What’s in this?” “It’s delicious right?” “Very… but what’s in it?” “Three kinds of rum, some orange juice, grenadine, and… I think triple sec. Been a while since I’ve made them myself.” “Wait, what? Three kinds of rum?” “Yup. Light, dark & Bacardi 151.” “What’s Bacardi 151?” “Well… it’s what turns a light drizzle into a Hurricane.” He liked ‘em… and they were great in the sunny cool weather that we had all weekend.

Saturday afternoon was the Utah-Cal college football game at AT&T Park. We got there a little early and had a few Stella Artois at a nearby grilled cheese establishment & then went to the game. Today’s Tip: If you’re expecting to get a few incredibly expensive beers at AT&T Park for a college football game, you’re going to be horribly disappointed. Apparently the stadium goes dry as a bone for them. Not a big concern, but just giving you some warning. The stadium was great. The seats were 2nd row at the 35 yard line right behind the U of U bench. You could smell the players if you wanted to. The game… well, the game was absolutely atrocious if you’re a U fan. They did manage to get a field goal in the 4th quarter before we left, but the Bears routed ‘em 34-10 and it really wasn’t even that close. We had a great time though because my dad & I are just that way… and we were sitting next to a large Samoan family whose relative was the nose tackle for the U & he was having a pretty good game of stopping the run… so every time he was in on a tackle, we all went ape sh*t!!! Great times. Then we took the bus home & my dad turned in early because… well, he’s over 50 now… and we had an “early morning” planned the next day.

Willie Mays... Hayes?

Watch out for my balls...

This is what 2nd row is like...

especially when there's technically no 1st row

Sunday morning was the Raiders-Chiefs game at Oakland Coliseum ( or is the official sponsor… but who cares really?). We loaded up Gretchen with plenty of booze… and a few chips… and headed to the coliseum. Along the way, we noticed that there were maybe 5 Chiefs fan in the entire place. We tailgated in the parking lot… and we apparently picked a pretty good spot right next to a wonderful Hispanic family making steak fajitas, a family from SoCal who had worked with my business a few times, and a girl that was smoking hot… with her boyfriend. We got a pretty good buzz going & got to know our neighbors… and before it was all done, they had offered us some fajitas with homemade salsa & guacamole in exchange for a few shots of Jose Cuervo Silver. SOLD!!! Again, the game was pretty horrible if you were rooting for the Raiders. The Chiefs weren’t doing necessarily great… but the quarterbacks threw 6 interceptions for two touchdowns to the other team. The Chiefs won 28-0 but we left as the 4th quarter was starting… because the game wasn’t going well, the sun was right in our face, and I’m pretty sure my dad was nodding off (possibly heat stroke) so I got him some water & drove him home. So much for a great start to the big Carson Palmer trade… but hey, he only had three days of practice to get ready from his retirement. Next game in two weeks should be better for him.

After we got back, my dad nodded off watching the Saints destroy the Colts on TV… so I went to my basketball gamewith a bit of a buzz still going & left him to get some rest. The game was more of the same. I only missed one shot, but I had to create my own off my teammates horrible misses. We ended up only losing by 9 but we could’ve been a lot more competitive if they would just give me the ball once in a while. Whatever though, I’ll be on a company team before soon & we’ll have an actual strategy more than likely. After that, went home, dad was awake… for a while… and we watched the new “Robin Hood” movie starring Russell Crowe. It was pretty good, I guess. I enjoyed it. My dad’s doing fine. He woke up Monday morning with a little bit of a headache but wandered around the Presidio before I took him to the airport after work. We talked about how much fun we had & how much we missed each other… but yeah, it was a great weekend. It was great to spend some time with him.

About three minutes after dropping him off, I get a call from the softball team manager. “Are you coming tonight?” “We have a game tonight? I thought it was the bye week before the playoffs.” “Nope, we have a game starting in a few minutes & we need players.” “Shoot, I just dropped my dad off at Oakland Airport but I can probably be there in… 30-45 minutes. I’ll hurry. Do you have a spare glove?” I’ll spare you the details… but 18 minutes later, I was pulling into the parking lot of the softball field ready to go. Gretchen is an amazing machine. We were still shorthanded at 9 with four girls… but we played, fairly poorly… and ended up losing by one. So our undefeated season is over… but we’re still the top seed for the playoffs next week. Besides, we were shorthanded, caught by surprise & without our best players… and we still only lost a really close game with some controversial calls. Afterwards, we went out for a few drinks too. Now for some news…

Koalas: The Other Cute Bears – Sadly, Pandas aren’t the only cute bears that can’t seem to survive on their own. On Thursday, lawmakers said that special koala tunnels and tougher road speed limits would help avoid one of the leading causes of death of Australia's iconic marsupial. No-one knows how many koalas are left in the wild (experts estimate anywhere between 43,000 to 300,000, which is kind of like saying “Eh, they’re out there”) but the numbers are slowly falling and road deaths are the second biggest cause (I’m guessing behind… tree deaths? Underwater deaths?). An inquiry by the upper house Senate urged national and state government to take action to nurture the much-loved furry marsupial. "The committee is pleased that the koala may not yet be eligible for listing as threatened. The committee believes that to have such a significant Australian icon included on the threatened species list would be national shame," its acting chairman Doug Cameron said. It found that loss of habitat due to land clearing was the biggest risk to koalas, which live almost entirely on gum tree leaves. HA! So it WAS tree deaths! BOOYAH!!! Numbers have also been reduced by an AIDS-like virus which causes immune deficiency and cancer (Koal-AIDS?). In the north-eastern Queensland state, authorities reported more than 4,500 koalas were hit by cars over 12 years to 2009, prompting the state government to commit to "koala-friendly" designs for main road construction. Some areas of dense koala populations also have special koala-proof fences around major roads, and tunnels which allow the animals to cross safely underneath. The Senate inquiry recommended local governments introduce lower speed limits around known koala areas, install koala-proof fencing on major roads, and build more tunnels and bridges to allow koalas to cross roads safely. OR!!! Check this idea out… maybe if there was some kind of… I don’t know, above ground mains of transportation. Like… these interconnecting organisms that grow on their own… and koala can some move through these organisms with about the same ease as a tunnel under a major freeway. I’ve heard of something like this in what scientists call “forests” but I forget what they’re called. I’ll have to google it. So yeah… koalas need our help to become underground dwelling creatures apparently.

Cage Update – Speaking of “forests”, here’s a little ditty that I found interesting. There’s a movie being made soon that will be Scott Walker's directorial debut called “The Frozen Ground”. Based on true events, John Cusack plays respected Alaskan family man Robert Hansen who abducted more than 24 women… flew them into the Alaskan wilderness… and hunted and murdered them. Nice, right? And yes… I said John Cusack. Anyway, Nicolas Cage plays an Alaskan State Trooper who finds an escaped girl (Vanessa Hudgens) on the street. Together they work to bring Hansen to justice. Curtis Jackson (aka 50 Cent) just signed on to play a 1980s-era pimp which is a reportedly 'substantial role'. Jackson and Randall Emmett are producing and shooting begins October 17th in Anchorage, Alaska. So… yeah. Keep an eye out for that. And if John Cusack runs into you in a dark alley in Anchorage, be cautious. He’s a method actor.

Bank Robbery Update – Okay, even though it’s not officially a bank robbery… I had to mention it. In the world of animated TV, it's no stretch to say that good-natured Gumby is far down the list of characters that would commit armed robbery. But a man clad in a full-figured Gumby costume has made a botched attempt to rob a 7-Eleven store in California, and authorities are looking for the suspect, police said on Wednesday. It happened early on Monday when the man came into the San Diego store dressed as the green claymation figure, accompanied by an ordinarily dressed accomplice, San Diego Police spokesman Detective Gary Hassen said. The costumed man announced he was robbing the store, but the clerk thought it was a joke, according to police. Understandably so… but wait, it gets better. "Gumby said, 'You don't think it's a robbery? Let me show you my gun,'" Hassen said. The suspect then tried to reach into his Gumby outfit… but experienced a "costume malfunction" and could not fit his hand in a pocket. Instead of a gun, the costumed suspect pulled out 26 cents in change which he dropped on the floor. The accomplice, who had left the store and gotten into a minivan, honked at the man dressed as Gumby. He, too, walked out of the store without managing to take any money, police said. Both men left in the minivan. After their getaway, the store clerk was still not certain an attempted robbery had occurred and did not call police. That’s right. Nothing happened. The store manager, who arrived later that morning, reported the incident. Police were treating the episode, which was captured on surveillance video (come on… YouTube), as an attempted robbery and not a prank, Hassen said. I wonder if they originally tried to get the accomplice to dress up as Pokey… but he couldn’t drive the minivan in full regalia. Anyway, how do I rate this? D- all the way. Why not an F? Because they almost didn’t even get called on… and there’s probably a viral video that I expect to see on Tosh.0 before long.

Toe Suck Fairy - A man known in Arkansas as the "Toe Suck Fairy" for a series of 1990s assaults directed at women's feet was arrested after he struck again more than a decade later, police said. Michael Robert Wyatt, 50, was arrested on Monday after two women identified him from a photo line-up as "the man who approached them in local stores commenting on their feet and asking to suck their toes," said LaTresha Woodruff, spokeswoman for the Conway Police Department. How’s that for the direct approach? One of the women described the man as having "really messed up toes." Earlier in the month an 83-year-old woman told police she was sitting in a chair in front of her apartment when a man approached her. He took off one of her shoes and began sucking her toes, police said. Wow, not even an introduction? In the 1990s, Wyatt was convicted and even served time in prison for his obsession. “What’re you in for?” He had pretended to be a podiatrist in order to fondle and suck a Conway, Arkansas, woman's toes at a clothing store. And, he was convicted in 1991 of making threats for telling a convenience store clerk that he wanted to cut off her feet and suck her toes while she bled to death. Okay… now it’s not just a creepy fetish. For that, he was sentence to four years in state prison, but served just over a year. In 1999, Wyatt was arrested again, police said, after asking a woman in a northwest Arkansas Walmart if she wanted him to amputate her feet and showing her pictures of women with no feet. Wyatt was picked up at his home in Vilonia, about 15 miles from Conway, where three incidents have been reported in the past few weeks. Conway is about 30 miles north of Little Rock. Well, at least they got him before it got SUPER creepy again. Poor people who can’t handle their craziness in constructive ways. Might I recommend a blog read by dozens across the worlds? Baker’s dozens?

Anyway, on that note, I’ll leave you be for the time being. Vegas is mere weeks away & I seriously can’t wait… and neither can Jackie D. It’s going to be EPIC!!! Even moreso than this past weekend. Have a great day everybody!!!

Where Should I Go Next?