Tu As Un Mirroir Dans Ta Poche?

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

(Sigh…) Okay, yesterday I was packing some boxes for my impending move to Denver, where I recently accepted a position at a well-established company in the area. While packing, my phone rings with a 303 area code, cool beans it's Denver calling. Remembering past mishaps when assuming it's somebody I know, I refrained from answering in a less than professional manner…and the following conversation ensues…

$teve: "Good Afternoon, this is $teve."

Female Voice: "Good afternoon, is this Dr. Love?"

$teve: "Yes it is. How may I help you?"

Female Voice: "Well, Dr. Love…this is (HR manager for new employer) and I've just called to inform you that…we can't officially offer you the position because…well, according to our records, you never officially applied for the position…or had an organized interview."

$teve: "(Stunned silence) Ugh…I didn’t…then how did you get this number if I didn't apply? I applied online…and then two days later, New Boss Man J called me up and did an interview. Granted it was a little informal but…that's what I was supposed to do, right?"

Female Voice: "We'll just need you to apply in the system again and then we'll have an official standardized interview set up for you later in the week."

$teve: "So…do I start next Wednesday still? I mean…as we speak, I'm packing for a move to Denver because I accepted a position four days ago." (I'm trying hard not to use the phrase WTF during the phone call…as that's considered unprofessional)

Female Voice: "We'll just need you to apply again…then we'll set up the interview." (So, that's a maybe?)

$teve: "Ugh…okay, thank you bye bye (Click)"



I then immediately called Boss Man B to find out WTF was going on…and I have yet to have an official answer…but I'm guessing it's just some kind of HR program glitch and/or deleted email or something…but now I'm a little worried…but not much. I don't know what it is with HR department and me…but I always seem to get into some kind of fiasco with them. A few years ago, I had a problem with Tuition Reimbursement (over $1300) that didn't get resolved for 13 months because THEY decided to change the system for that semester…and lost all of my information. Then the systems changed a few times since then so it's all online…so whenever I go to there to ask them a question like "Who f**ked up my paycheck this time?" their response was the website URL. Made me wonder exactly what they do for a job…and if there was a way that I could get an extra paycheck by training a parrot to repeat the website URL whenever somebody walks in the door…and eliminate the department completely. It was not to be…and they were nice ladies so I didn't want them to have to sell their bodies on the streets for money. Behind this rough, rugged mountain man exterior is a heart of gold. Anyway, so hopefully I'll find out something reassuring in the next few hours…because I still plan on working there in less than a week now.


So…in other confusing news, my brother & sister-in-law may try to work things out. He called me last night during work for "brotherly advice" in the situation. He didn't want to ask my mom or dad about it…because he knew how each would answer…and it would be a draw. So basically, I was the swing vote. Allegedly, my sister-in-law (still officially in-law) casually mentioned the possibility that she was thinking about moving back in…as he was going to work. This of course got him thinking as to whether he should give her a second chance…or more realistically like an eighth chance. However, he wanted to know what I thought…but I'm not falling for that stuff…so I asked for more details on the events of the past few days/weeks, what HE thought he should do, a little advice as to the next step in finding out whether it's a viable option, offered my services as a delegator (though I'll be in the next state probably), suggested professional counseling (instead of pro bono community service) and we'll see where it goes from there. Frankly, at this point, I could give two turd sandwiches what they decide to do…as long as they don't fight in front of the kids or anything like that. I'll keep you posted…but I have a feeling it'll just sound like a broken record…that takes about four weeks to revolve. Now for some real news…


Boss Gender & Stress Correlation - Speaking of work related stress, a new study finds that your boss' gender can affect just how much pain he or she seems to inflict. Researchers at the University of Toronto used data from a 2005 national telephone survey of working adults in the United States (because Canadians are stress-free) and compared the stress levels and physical health problems of men and women working in one of three situations: for a lone male supervisor, a lone female supervisor, or for both a male and female supervisor. The study found that:

• Women who had only one female boss reported more psychological distress (such as trouble sleeping, difficulty focusing on work, depression and anxiety) and physical symptoms (such as headaches, stomach pain or heartburn, neck and back pain and tiredness) than women who worked for one male boss.


• Women who reported to a mixed-gender pair of supervisors also reported more of these symptoms than their peers who worked for a single male boss.


• Men who worked for a single supervisor, regardless of the supervisor's gender, had similar levels of distress.


• Men who worked for a mixed-gender pair had fewer mental and physical symptoms than those working for a lone male supervisor.
  

The analysis, detailed in the September issue of the Journal of Health and Social Behavior, controlled for occupation, job sector and other workplace conditions, meaning the results were independent of these factors. The findings, specifically those of female subordinates with females bosses, contradict theories suggested by previous studies that demographic similarities between a boss and their subordinate would promote harmony in the work place, while demographic differences would create problems. Just a little something to think about. I've never really had a major problem with a boss before…except for when I was on the men's basketball practice squad at the U and coach Rick Majerus called me an A-hole a few times. The weird thing was…HE'S the real A-hole. Oh well, it didn't last long…and my career is still young. Perhaps I will have a boss that I can't stand one day. I hope that's not the case…but at the very least, I should be prepared.

Election F**kups - A publicity stunt by an underdog in the race to be governor of Bangkok went badly wrong when her campaign manager drowned as they bathed in a canal to highlight the plight of residents who have no access to clean water. Candidate Leena Jangjanya said 32-year-old Thirasak Sitanont drowned Thursday as she and other staff were showing journalists the rashes they got from washing in the filthy water. A sobbing Leena told reporters, "One of my staff saw him waving and crying for help, but we thought he was pretending and he was far away from us, posing for two TV crews. A few minutes later he disappeared and we had to call the police to come and find him" said Leena, who had fallen into another canal in front of the TV cameras Wednesday as she was trying to show her support for riverboat commuters. Leena, a businesswoman, is among 16 candidates in the race to be governor of Thailand's capital city of 10 million people. She said she had suspended her campaign for the October 5 election to help arrange a funeral for Thirasak and look after his wife, who is seven months pregnant. "If I were to continue to campaign after his death, I would be no better than an animal." You would probably also be running a losing campaign. That's kind of like…holding a press conference talking about how you're going to take a strong stance of crime…like mugging somebody at knife-point (or machete-point in Thailand) and then somebody standing next to you on the podium is being robbed…and you respond with "He's not really getting robbed. It's all a publicity stunt." Oops! It's just a sad story really…but I try to make a giggle out of it. It's a defense mechanism. Moral of the story - If somebody looks like they need help, help them. Also, don't cry wolf.


Mother's Cream - Is it wrong that I think PETA takes a good idea too far most of the time? PETA now wants world-famous Ben & Jerry's Homemade Ice Cream to tap nursing moms, rather than cows, for the milk used in its ice cream…saying it would reduce the suffering of cows and calves and give ice cream lovers a healthier product (as well as enter certain fetish markets). It takes about 12 pounds (1.5 gallons of milk) to make a gallon of ice cream. Ben & Jerry's, which gets its milk exclusively from Vermont cows, won't say how much milk it uses or how much ice cream it sells. PETA campaign coordinator Ashley Byrne acknowledged the implausibility of substituting breast milk for cow's milk, but said it's no stranger than humans consuming the milk of another species. "We're aware this idea is somewhat absurd (that's a good start) and that putting it into practice is a stretch. At the same time, it's pretty absurd for us to be drinking the milk of cows." Okay, you lost me…but I'll bite anyway. To Ben & Jerry's, the idea is udderly ridiculous (rimshot). "We applaud PETA's novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother's milk is best used for her child." Now…I guess this really isn't news as much as a random idea that PETA sent to Ben & Jerry's…but I'm not entirely sure that it's not a bad idea. Sure, making breast milk ice cream on a national scale would be cumbersome at first from a logistical standpoint…but maybe if you're a local ma & pa ice cream shop looking for that little niche in your neighborhood when you're surrounded by the Coldstones & Baskin Robbins giants…and you help out at a local women's shelter where some great girls going through some tough times are looking for a way to make a few bucks…just maybe you can…you know what, cows are cheaper and produce more. Can you imagine how many lactating Brazilian women it would take to make a gallon of breast milk ice cream? I think that I can…but just to be sure, I'm going to think about it long & hard for a few minutes. Feel free to join me. Mmm, it tastes like papaya…

What's In A Name? Everything!!! - Italian researchers said on Monday that a Chinese herbal remedy called Horny Goat Weed a promising alternative to Viagra for impotent men. The herb has long held a reputation as a natural aphrodisiac (oh, so it's not just a clever name). The lab experiments, which did not look at whether the plant actually increases desire, could lead to new drugs to help men get erections, said Mario Dell'Agli, a researcher at the University of Milan. "This could be the natural Viagra. The novelty is that we have synthesized a new molecule that one day may be able to replace Viagra." Erectile dysfunction is a common condition worldwide and drugs like this work by inhibiting an enzyme called phosphodiesterase type 5 that restricts blood flow around the body, including to the penis…and can have side effects ranging from headaches, upset stomach and visual problems including blindness (why there's that 4 Hour warning thing on all of the commercials). The Italian team looked for alternatives by studying a number of plants reputed to boost sexual performance. After homing in on horny goat weed, the researchers modified a compound in the plant called Icariin and found it blocked the erection-inhibiting enzyme as well as Viagra did…but with possibly fewer side effects (more tests needed). Who would think that something called Horny Goat Weed might be able to help you rise to the occasion?


Anyway, that'll do it for today. Hope to hear good news about the new job that I...have? Also, big thanks to Lilie for the admirable yet futile attempt to try to teach me French. Have a great day everybody!!!