Not much to report with me…but sadly, a few of my friends in Vegas have had their own Day of Infamy now. They have a few months to prepare, so plenty of time to figure out what they want to do & where they want to go…but still, I know it sucks. I’ve been there. I’m trying to help out as best I can…and I’d appreciate any suggestions that I could pass along to Bubbles & Barbie. I’m sure they’ll be fine…but you know. Other than that, just spent most of last night chatting on Facebook with Lilie, Angel, K-Fish and others while talking on the phone & posting a blog entry. My multitasking skills extend to the home apparently…and I do it flawlessly…except for typing errors & random laughter, I’m sure. So without further ado, here’s the news…
Angelina to the Rescue - The U.N. refugee agency says its goodwill ambassador Angelina Jolie is heading to Haiti to meet with earthquake victims. The Hollywood star spoke with hospitalized Haitian survivors in the neighboring Dominican Republic on Monday. UNHCR spokesman Andrej Mahecic said Jolie would travel to Haiti later Tuesday. He provided no details of her planned itinerary for security reasons (but I’m sure TMZ will be there). Jolie has previously visited Iraq, Thailand, Pakistan and other countries with UNHCR. It’s great to see a celebrity like Angelina really going out and raising awareness & doing something. Kudos. However, I’m just kind of picturing the scene of her arrival. Huddled masses seek shelter from the harsh, unforgiving conditions. It has been days since their last food or water. Their bodies are weak, their minds numb with pain, worry & fear. Suddenly there is a commotion nearby. What could it be? Out steps this gorgeous woman (and I mean… daaaaaaaamn) in a simple white frock handing out water & rations, hugging children, smiling with a radiance that seems to dim the very sun. An angel has saved us. She kneels down to an elderly woman lying in the fetal position. “Here, have some water.” The elderly woman turns to gaze upon this messenger standing over her, offering her salvation. “I am ready, my Lord.” Trust me. It’s gonna happen.
Swimsuit Edition - Model Brooklyn Decker landed the coveted Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover this year. The 22-year-old wife of tennis star Andy Roddick said being chosen for the front is "the news of a lifetime." The cover photo of Decker smiling in a yellow bikini (sort of) is a departure from the more sultry look that SI had gone for the past few years, she said (Yeah, the whole “whoopsy, I lost my swimsuit” angle with a mischievous smile, that’s not sultry at all). She compared it to covers from the 1980s or '90s, when Elle Macpherson won her covers with a friendly, sun-loving look. SI keeps the cover photo a secret (even from the models) until less than 24 hours before it's revealed. Decker said now the mad dash was on to find outfits for TV appearances that will come with the gig. (Her closet of swimsuits wasn't right for winter, she joked.) As for Roddick? He's relieved the five-time SI Swimsuit model can check the cover-girl box and won't be as nervous next February when the next edition comes out. Decker says she is an avid sports fan, and, as a teenager in North Carolina, ran hurdles for the track team, played soccer and participated in competitive cheerleading. She has no great diet or exercise secret, she said, other than to be active and eat sensibly (and purging never hurt…I’m just kidding, I love big girls & hate the Media, remember?). "I still don't know the formula for the cover (36-24-36 plus / minus 2?). It's luck, the perfect suit and perfect storm to get it." Decker said, though, that because Sports Illustrated encourages a natural look (less makeup, toned muscles, curvy shape, rrrrrrrrrr) it's easier to get a great photograph. "This celebrates the girls and their personalities. I think it's why they get such beautiful pictures." Congratulations!!! Not only have you landed the cover of Sports Illustrated…but you also successfully got a Jay-Z / Li’l Wayne song stuck in my head. “HELLOOOO BROOKLYYYYYYN!!!”
Beer Better Than Milk? – Not entirely sure why I’m thinking about cold filtered beer & milk after talking about a supermodel but…oh well. Beer drinkers now have a good excuse to order another round. A study has found that the brew may help keep bones strong. Researchers from the Department of Food Science & Technology at the University of California have found beer is a rich source of silicon (tehehehe, still don’t know why) and may help prevent osteoporosis, as dietary silicon is a key ingredient for increasing bone mineral density (not that bone). These were the findings after researchers tested 100 commercial beers for silicon content and categorized the data according to beer style and source. Previous research has suggested beer contained silicon but little was known about how silicon levels varied with the different types of beer and malting processes. "We have examined a wide range of beer styles for their silicon content and have also studied the impact of raw materials and the brewing process on the quantities of silicon that enter wort and beer," researcher Charles Bamforth said in a statement. The study, published in the Journal of the Science of Food and Agriculture, found the beers' silicon content ranged from 6.4 milligrams per liter to 56.5 mg per liter. The average person's silicon intake each day is between 20 and 50 mgs. The researchers found there was little change in the silicon content of barley during the malting process as most of the silicon in barley is in the husk, which is not affected greatly during malting. They found pale ales showed the highest silicon content while non-alcoholic beers (barley juice?), light lagers and wheat beers had the least silicon. "Beers containing high levels of malted barley and hops are richest in silicon. Wheat contains less silicon than barley because it is the husk of the barley that is rich in this element." But Bamforth told reporters that the results shouldn't be taken too serious. The study examined the beers but it did not look at bone mineral density or analyze patients' data. "I would first consider flavor and whether you like it or not," he told science and technology magazine Discover. "Choose the beer you enjoy, for goodness sake." Amen. So do you want strong bones and to make women around you prettier? Have another beer!!! This one’s for you, Doc!!!
I’m So Hungry I Could Eat… - What goes well with beer? “Everything!!!” Everything? Well, a traditional Emirati restaurant in Dubai has added a new entree to its menu billed as a fat-free choice for carnivorous but health-conscious diners: the Camel Burger. For 20 UAE dirhams ($5.45), the Local House restaurant offers a quarter pound camel burger, loaded with cheese and smothered in burger sauce (also fat-free?), the Xpress weekly newspaper reported on Thursday. Ali Ahmad Esmail, Local House assistant manager, told the paper that the burger patties were fat- and cholesterol-free. But he declined to say how the outlet tenderized the tough camel meat. "It's a trade secret," he said. Probably has something to do with Rocky Balboa. Camel meat is widely eaten in some Arab countries, but is not typically sold in supermarkets or served in restaurants. The paper reported that Local House said it was the first to introduce the burger in the United Arab Emirates. A fast food outlet in neighboring Saudi Arabia put baby camel burgers on its menu last year (mmm, that sounds deliciously evil). The camel burger, a hit with residents and tourists, could soon also be on offer in the Burj Khalifa, the world's tallest tower formerly known as Burj Dubai, where Local House may open a branch, the paper said. (Alas, they just announced the other day that the tower is closing for a few months due to electrical problems. See, I follow this kind of stuff. No, YOU’RE a nerd!!!) The burger is served with fries or potato wedges, and the paper suggested it could be washed down with a soft drink or a camel milkshake (oh God, I just puked a little), also available in Dubai. I was all for that until the milkshake. I don’t trust it. I’ve seen too many episodes of the “Wildboyz” or something to trust that. Anyway, if you’re ever in Dubai, maybe check out the camel burgers. “This burger’s ugh…a little dry.” “Is 125 degrees outside, my friend. What the f**k do you expect?” “Still I…” “No, is okay. I understand. How about I make you fresh milkshake to help wash that down? I’ll be back in…about ten minutes. I ugh…just need to find some ice.” No, I never worked in the fast food industry… nor complained.
Panda Update – Now for the most delicious animal of all. It was like getting a cat out of a tree…but Sichuan style. Villagers in southwestern China's Sichuan province discovered a panda stranded on a steep mountain face, apparently too scared to climb down, state media reported Tuesday. Villagers didn't dare attempt a rescue of the endangered animal but called animal conservationists and fed the panda bananas (hmm…wonder if he liked them) while they waited for help, the China Central Television report said. "The panda is a national treasure, so everyone's scared to hurt it," a local forestry official was quoted as saying. The giant panda, estimated to be about 3-4 years old, was eventually lured from behind a tree with more bananas (I guess so) and managed to scramble off the mountain. Only about 1,600 pandas live in the wild, mostly in Sichuan. Another 120 are in Chinese breeding facilities and zoos, and about 20 live in zoos outside China. Now, this doesn’t have much to do with the story…but I wonder if the diet of a panda has a lot to do with their inability to reproduce. I know it does in the fact that they spend basically 95% of their waking moments eating and the other 5% being stuck on mountain faces…but have the researchers tried foods that are aphrodisiacs? I hear bananas have some nutrients for that…but wouldn’t it be awesome if the key to saving pandas…was feeding them oysters & pumpkin pie? Or maybe their stomachs are a little different so…maybe it’s like bananas and…I don’t know, small unwanted children? Listen up, People’s Republic of China!!! Two birds, one stone. That’s all I’m saying. You already stole Panda Porn from me, you might as well take credit for this idea too. At least it’ll help save the pandas. No need to thank me, just pay it forward.
On that note (starting with an angelic Angelina and ending up feeding children to bears), I’m going to wrap this up. Thanks again for listening…er, reading. Again, if you have any suggestions to help out Bubbles, Barbie or anybody else looking for a job, please feel free to share with me. There’s a lot of good people struggling out there…and I have some experience & ideas…but I’m always looking to expand my repertoire. Oh yeah, French vocabulary. What now? It’s snowing beautifully outside. Wish you were all here to share it by the fireplace…but alas, maybe the warmth of laughter will help relay the sentiment. Have a great night everybody!!!