Single Awareness Weekend Report

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, I had a fairly splendid Valentine's Day Weekend. I did some good deeds on Friday the 13th. Saturday, I was all pumped to start the weekend, so I went to the gym…and then promptly landed funny while shooting hoops and pulled a muscle in my lower back. Yeah, it hurt a bit…but no biggie. It wasn't going to hold me down…just end my day at the gym. So I went back to the apartment, cooked me a nice lunch and talked with some of the ladyfriends…since it was Valentine's Day. Then that night, my cousin Ranae came over and we headed to the Tavern for a few drinks. It was a lot of fun. We caught up…since we really hadn't just hung out in about a decade…usually our family reunions are just too hectic to do anything…what with literally HUNDREDS of little kids running around (mom was one of 17 kids…and all my cousins are of breeding years…and now some of my cousins' kids are getting there…but I'm not old). We sat back, had a few drinks, and watched a bit of the NBA All-Star weekend and even a professional Lacrosse game (we weren't familiar with it, so we basically mocked it and looked at the other team's logo and read the subtitles trying to figure out who they were...and it ended up being the Roughnecks, we were WAY off) all while listening to hits of the 80's and 90's that we seemed to have stories associated with each one. "Holy crap, this song was such a huge hit when I was in high school (sigh) ten years ago." We're just a few months apart age-wise, so yeah…we related to a lot of music.

Get this. Jlee commented on my blog yesterday about my touching Valentine's note of a hopeless romantic...while listening to Richard Cheese's version of "Rape Me" on my music list…so that's why I mention this. One of the songs that came on was Depeche Mode's "Personal Jesus" of which is also covered by Mr. Cheese. So I start laughing a bit…and she is too (probably just to humor me). "Sorry, I just…do you know who Richard Cheese is?" She looked at me wide-eyed, "Ricardo Caso? YES!!! I was thinking about him earlier when Belle Biv Devoe was on." "Get the f**k out! I have all eight of his CDs and I just got this new live album in the mail the other day." So yeah, we were super excited to find other Richard Cheese fans. Good times. We hung out for a while and watched "Tropic Thunder" (she hadn't seen it but wanted to). Lot of fun…and it's good to know that there's somebody nearby that if we get bored, we can just call up and hang out. Also, God forbid if anything should happen, I've got family nearby. Definitely a reassuring thought. Much more reassuring than the thought that it seems one of my best Valentine's "dates" ever was with my cousin…but she still doesn't beat last year with Bubbles & the Mad Scientist.

Sunday, I basically didn't do a damn thing. I don't know how else to put it. More specifically, I went to Walgreen's to get toilet paper & conditioner…and basically spent the rest of the day talking to family and…get this, READING. I know, what the hell's going on? There is some great news that comes out of this though. The Wingmans may be going to California with me that first week of April. I got a message from Mrs Wingman that they just got back from Vegas for the weekend and missed me (can't believe it's been almost two years since we last went) so we got to talking…and they really want to go. It'll also be great for me…because then if I don’t wanna do the same thing as my 12-year old cousin…or simply can't stand being around my aunt or something, we can hope in the Wingman's Yellow Taxi and head to a strip club or grunion hunt or go fly a kite or something. It keeps our options open…and our fists unclenched. Oh…and before that, I leave for Mardi Gras in three days. Yay! Good time to be me…and definitely a great Valentine's Weekend. Enough about me though…here's the news...

I Swear This NEVER Happens - A man who reached into his pocket to pay for lunch at a hospital cafeteria in Lafayette, Colorado accidentally shot himself with the gun in his pocket. Police and officials at Exempla Good Samaritan Medical Center said it was an unfortunate accident. Officials said 59-year-old Steve Tapp of Thornton was treated at the hospital and released. No one else was hurt…despite reports that one man laughed so hard that "his side split open" but that was later confirmed to be false. Officials said Tapp, who was visiting family at the hospital, shot himself in the right thigh Tuesday. Security guards responded and took the gun. Tapp faces possible misdemeanor charges of unlawfully carrying a concealed weapon, prohibited use of a weapon and reckless endangerment. The hospital forbids guns, although no sign was posted Tuesday stating the policy. At least he was in the right place to have his gun accidentally go off in his hand.

Record Breaking Broken - A Utah woman listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for her long fingernails has lost them in a car crash. Lee Redmond of Salt Lake City sustained serious but non-life-threatening injuries in the accident Tuesday. Redmond's nails, which hadn't been cut since 1979, were broken in the crash. According to the Guinness Web site, her nails measured a total of more than 28 feet long in 2008, with the longest nail on her right thumb at 2 feet, 11 inches. Salt Lake County Sheriff's Lt. Don Hutson says Redmond was ejected from an SUV in the crash and taken to the hospital in serious condition. I wish Ms. Redmond a speedy recover…and it's amazing that somebody has fingernails older than I am…and a little creepy all at the same time. I can't believe that I never met this lady…and she was in Slick City the whole time. Maybe she just hung out at home waiting for her fingernails to grow…with her cats. I don't know. Maybe it's just a feeling that I get from this picture.

Act Like A Millionaire - A flashy handbag or Armani suit can signal a person's wealth, but so can their body language, according to a new study. People of higher socioeconomic status are more rude when conversing with others. Psychologists Michael Kraus and Dacher Keltner at UC-Berkeley, videotaped pairs of undergraduate students who were strangers to one another, during one-on-one interviews. In total, 100 undergraduate students participated. The researchers then looked for certain gestures that indicate level of interest in the other person during one-minute slices of each conversation. They found that students whose parents were from higher socioeconomic status (SES) backgrounds engaged in more of what he called "impolite" behaviors, such as grooming, doodling and fidgeting. Lower SES students showed more "I'm interested" gestures, including laughter and raising of the eyebrows The higher SES students fidgeted with nearby objects (money clips?) for an average of two seconds, while those from lower SES backgrounds almost never fidgeted during the 60-second clips. Upper SES students also groomed themselves for short stints while lower SES students didn't. Rather, the lower SES students nodded their heads, laughed and raised their eyebrows an average of one to two seconds more than their upper SES counterparts. "We're talking seconds here, but that is a pretty big difference when you consider that we coded one minute of interaction time. So how many times a day are you nodding if you're lower socioeconomic status?" It comes down to our animalistic tendencies, Kraus explained. Like a peacock's tail, the seemingly snooty gestures of higher SES students indicates modern society's version of "I'm fit," and "I don't need you." "In the animal world, conflict arises when you're battling for status. So it's adaptive for us to avoid those conflicts and tell us we know 'I'm higher status than you, so don't bother having a conflict with me,'" Kraus figures. Lower SES individuals can't afford to brush off others. "Lower SES people have fewer resources, and by definition should be more dependent on others." Not really sure if this was news to anybody…but maybe it can come in handy. Hmm, maybe if I act like a douche, the ladies will think I'm loaded…and then be willing to put up with it in hopes of scamming me. Then I pull a Joe Millionaire on them…and it's the greatest April Fool's Day ever. I'd better get started on this. Only about six weeks until the big day.

Then again, apparently I'm just too damn nice for all that. So instead I'll just have to invest, live within my means, and still be the sexiest mother lover alive. That'll do it for today. Not much else to ramble about. Have a great day everybody!!!