The weather in San Francisco was absolutely gorgeous this weekend. Let’s see. Let’s just start from the beginning, I guess. Friday night, after work, I drove westward and was making fantastic time…until I got to the Bay Bridge to cross into San Francisco. See, apparently there was a Giants game (baseball) and it was Memorial Day Weekend and…well, just a lot of factors…so it took me about an hour to go two miles to pay four bucks for the toll bridge. Regardless, I met up with Bubbles a little after 7 PM and we wandered through the streets of San Francisco looking for a good time…and as usual, we searched for it in various bars…and as usual, we would find it. The first stop was Johnny Foley’s Irish Pub. Why? Piano bar…which apparently is our new thing. See, Cinco de Mayo, we hit up a piano bar. Remember when JL Clyde, BW & I went to a piano bar in Reno two weeks ago? I text Bubbles...and she was at a piano bar in Vegas. So it was only natural that we would easily sniff out one for the third time in less than a month…and it was a pretty good one. Though the music was a little more oldies than I think the crowd was used to (but I was singing right along with). “Under the Boardwalk…”
Next stop was a place that the doorman recommended called Bacchus Kirk, where the locals allegedly hung out. Well, we met a few German students there…and they wanted to do a crawl about town…and we were down…but after some bad directions…and an incident between $teve & a doorman, we parted ways. “Sir, I can’t have you standing out here with that beer.” “Well, this beer is empty so would you kindly point me in the direction of a trash can.” By the way, in my defense, there were dozens of other people standing around, half of which had beers in their hands, but Mr. Buzzkill was only talking to me. “Sir, I can’t have you standing here.” So I started dancing a little bit as I looked around for a trash can…and glanced over at Bubbles. “What do you want to do?” “Get me out of here.” “Done. Taxi?” Zoom. Gone. But not done. The next stop was the Irish Bank, obviously another pub-like establishment…and it was okay. Seeing as it was the first night in town, we left after a beer and continued working out our calves on the hike back up to the hotel.
The next day, we headed out to see the city. We walked through Chinatown, Little Italy, and over to Coit Tower to get the bird’s eye panoramic view of the city by the bay. Here are some pictures (similar to my previous post from my visit two months ago but with photogenic people this time)…
Panda Purse Pimpin'
"That's the most gangsta 12-year old white girl I've ever seen..."
After the tower, we went down to Fisherman’s Wharf for some lunch and wandering. While waiting for our table at the Pier Market (great place, kinda fancy) we were checking out the boats & I talked about wanting to sail around the world…when a pigeon came up to us. We had empathy for the little guy…because we were pretty hungry too…but then we noticed that this little guy had one foot. His name is Oswald. I’ve heard there are little traps or whatever that is usually the culprit for amputated pigeon feet…but I’d like to think that he got jumped by a bunch of ratbirds (aka prick pigeons) while trying to defend a woman’s honor…and so it was a noble loss. After dinner, we brought out some bread (and butter because who wouldn’t want some?) to bring to him…but we couldn’t find him. Surprising, I know. It’s okay though. He’s there watching over Bubbles in the dangerous city somewhere…and I’m sure that they’ll meet up and Bubbles will gladly feed him. By the way, this is one of the advantages of going on trips with me. I make everything into an overly elaborate & fairly interesting story (as you may have noticed from time to time) and create some memories about the trip to share later on. For example, later on down the road, you say “Hey, remember Fisherman’s Wharf when we went to San Fran?” “Oh yeah, that was kinda cool. Bit of a tourist trap though.” End of conversation. Or you say “Remember the pigeons?” “What? Who gives a sh*t about those pesky ratbirds?” Start of conversation about why big cities suck or something. Now, how about this? “I wonder how Oswald is doing.” “Ooooh, Oswald. With his little nub, such a gentleman trooper. I miss him. We should go back to the Wharf soon & see if he’s around.” I’m all about creating the experience…even if it just involves giving a pigeon an adorable name & a heroic back-story.
We continued to wander the Wharf and see the sights, donate to worthy causes (because I must have “sucker for a noble cause” written on my forehead) and there were some fantastic breakdancers that I’m happy to share with you now. The show was actually really entertaining with a funny MC performer and just incredible acrobats. Please enjoy.
Once I get my tan, my torso looks just like this guy...
I was too tall for the tall white guy wall
Of course there were street performers waiting there as well…but hey, you can’t knock good music. Also, I don’t know what it is…but I was kind of expecting songs about San Francisco while on the wharf. You know? Like Tony Bennett, Otis Redding, Journey, oh if we could be so lucky as to hear Journey. Instead though, it was really like listening to the Shrek soundtrack…over and over again. Now, I realize the songs are okay…and the kids love ‘em…but probably the most refreshing music during the whole walk through town…was a band of brothers & sisters, probably aged 9 to 15 or so…playing with a horrible garage band sound of a classic tune on their instruments ran from a car battery…and then a little nine-year old girl cried out to the world for the one thing that she really wanted, “Tequila!!!” I had to give a few dollars on that one. After that, we stopped by Walgreen’s to help get Bubbles set up in her new home (just got there last week & has been working, working, working) and then we did something that neither of us had done before…and ride the cable car back up the hill.
That night, we grabbed a bite to eat…and were ready to get dressed up for a night on the town. Being a gentleman, it only took me a matter of about a half hour to get from sweaty tourist to her majesty’s secret service…but with the ladies, including Bubbles, perfection takes time…and a LOT of second guessing. “How does this look?” “(stunned silence) Amazing.” “Why did you hesitate?” “You know my mind wanders off into daydreams about magical moonlight walks when I see women in dresses like that.” “Boosh*t boosh*t boosh*t!!!” The thing is…it really does…and she did look amazing…but it didn’t matter. I don’t even know why ladies really ask. If it looks horrible, I’ll let you know. If you’re a sticky wet dream come to life, my pants will tighten & I’ll let you know. If you can’t trust the Wang, who can you trust? Well, anyway, after HOURS of getting ready, and we were ready to hit the town like a couple of superhot secret agents, then she said, “I know you’ve been waiting for-EVER for me to get ready but… I’m really tired. Do you mind if we just call it a night & have a few cocktails or something here?” It could’ve been a trap, “Well, we did spend all this time getting ready…but I know we’re both pretty much broke right now too so… if you want, I have no problem with that.” “I’m sorry. I know you were looking forward to it but… we did do a lot of walking today.” “Agreed. I’m not sure we’d be able to close the club down or whatever anyway. Rest up tonight? Get ready for tomorrow? We do have the Carnival Parade in the morning.” “Oh, that’s right. Okay, then it’s settled. Would you mind mixing me up another drink?” “Not at all. Cheers.” Just goes to show, that’s it not a matter of where you go, but who you’re with. Raise your glasses, ladies & gentlemen. To Friendship!!! (clink) It’s a shame though…because I was looking good. This turd certainly polishes up nicely.
The next morning, I woke up nice & early, woke Bubbles up to get ready for the parade, went to get some breakfast, make a few calls that took a little longer than expected and then headed back…to find somebody had fallen back asleep. “Five more minutes!” “Five more minutes?” “Five more minutes.” “If you don’t want to go, we don’t have to go.” “No, I want to go…just five more minutes.” Repeat for about an hour…and then I just went for a walk around town and let her sleep. When she woke up, it was Sunday brunch time…and the parade was just about over. No worries…but that also means no pictures of senoritas in a surprising amount of material for as much skin as they’re showing. Instead we decided to take Gretchen and go for a nice little drive towards the Presidio and the Pacific Coast Highway. The bridge was busy thanks to the tourists…so after snapping a few pictures, we headed south towards Half Moon Bay. Here are some pictures…
This was literally as far back as the guy could get. Why?
While in HMB, we called A-Lo to see if she wanted to meet up for lunch…but oddly enough, she was at Golden Gate Park with her kids (happy birthday Lilly Lo) so maybe next time. At least I remembered that she lived nearby this trip out. Anyway, we ate at the Princeton Seafood Company and enjoyed some tasty fish tacos & salmon burgers. I highly recommend this place if you’re looking for a good meal on a modest budget. So then we drove around the coast a little more…
Can you do a cheesier grin?
An okay picture of San Francisco from Treasure Island...
Much better...
Welcome to San Francisco, ladies...
On the ride back, Bubbles took a nap while we meandered through traffic and Gretchen’s a magnificently smooth ride, even when freeway road conditions are questionable. Big ups to Gretchen!!! We had dinner at the Oriental Pearl in Chinatown, then headed back to Bacchus Kirk because we wanted to find some friends for Bubbles. Well, after a few drinks, we found some…and they seemed really nice. By the way, a great way to get free drinks (with or without roofies) is to hang around with Bubbles. Guys and girls alike will gladly buy your drinks, simply in exchange for your company. That’s the story & I’m sticking to it. Anyway, we closed the bar & took a cab home. Pretty fun night…of which Bubbles remembered about half of the next morning…but I filled her in on the rest…because that’s what friends are for.
The Bush Market will greatly disappoint you...
notice there are only two X's (Dos Equis) in the window
Aaaah... Drunk people are so cuuuute...
"Excuse me Bubbles, what side of the US is San Fran on?"
Monday, we really didn’t do much because…well, we did a lot of drinking the night before. I wasn’t really hung over…but the exhaustion of the weekend kinda caught up with me…and Bubbles as well. So we slept in, watched some movies on Comedy Central, and then watched an incredibly depressing HBO movie called “Taking Chance” starring Kevin Bacon as a Marine who volunteers to transport the body of a fallen soldier back to his hometown of Dubois, Wyoming. If you can take the drama, it’s a great little flick…but depressing as all hell. It’s okay though…because as I’ve been saying for years, everything’s better with Bacon. Oh…and Bubbles got me a little friend to take back to Tahoe with me. Her name is Francesca…
Shortly after that, I headed back for Truckee and made pretty good time back…but I already miss my buddy Bubbles…and San Francisco. It was a great weekend & we had a lot of fun. Thanks again Bubbles for letting me show you your new home of the City by the Bay…and hopefully some time soon, I’ll be able to return the favor by showing off my City by the Lake. Anyway, that’s how I spent my Memorial Weekend (at least what I remember from all the drinking). How about you? Have a great day everybody!!!
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