Thursday, June 25, 2009

Did you hear about Jacko?

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, tonight's the NBA Draft and apparently Shaq & LeBron will be joining forces next year through trades...and my Spurs got a great new weapon for their arsenal...but more on that tomorrow. Tonight I'm going to get my culture on at the Andre Rieu & his Johann Strauss Orchestra concert at USANA. I'll be going with my mom, my stepdad and...my aunt. (Sigh...) It'll still be fun...because hopefully she can keep quiet while the music is playing. What else might you find interesting? Well, I was in a little training seminar today...and we had a little ice breaker thing...and the question was "If you were on a deserted island, what 3 people live, dead or imaginary would you want with you? And please no family or friends, that's boring." Of course, I went first...so my response off the fly was "Well, My Lord & Savior Jesus first & foremost because he'd be a great doctor to have around...and that whole water to wine thing would prove useful. Next would be...the Professor from Gilligan's Island because that dude can make a television out of coconuts & reeds, so that could prove entertaining. Last but definitely not least, Megan Fox...because." "Because?" "I'm at a work seminar...so I'll just leave it as...because." Other than that, nothing really out of the ordinary...so here's some news...

Crazy Bunny Lady - Oregon's "Bunny Lady" is back in the hutch after violating a court order banning her from owning animals for five years. Miriam Sakewitz, 47, was arrested Tuesday at a hotel in the Portland suburb of Tigard after an employee reported finding rabbits hopping around in her room. Problems for Sakewitz started in October 2006 when police in Hillsboro, about 15 miles west of Portland, found and confiscated nearly 250 rabbits in her home, including about 100 dead ones in freezers and refrigerators (veeeery creepy). Police said she broke into the facility where the survivors were being cared for in January 2007 and stole most of them back. Authorities found her a few days later in Chehalis, Washington, with eight live rabbits and two dead ones in her car. Another 130 rabbits were recovered at a nearby horse farm. Sakewitz was sentenced in April 2007 to five years probation and was banned from owning or controlling animals. She also was told not to go within 100 yards of a rabbit. That summer, Sakewitz was ordered to spend three days in jail for violating her probation by keeping a rabbit in her house. County probation officer Susan Ranger also said Sakewitz had canceled counseling sessions and refused to open the door for unannounced visits. Ranger said she found no rabbits when she finally got inside but did find a half-empty 10-pound bag of carrots. Since then, Sakewitz has remained "pretty quiet" — until this week, said Washington County probation officer Bob Severe. "We hadn't heard much further from her," he said, adding she was thought to be living in Clackamas County. On Tuesday, Washington County animal control officers removed eight adult rabbits, five young ones and a dead one from Sakewitz's hotel room, Tigard police spokesman Jim Wolf said. Sakewitz was in custody Wednesday, and Wolf said he did not know if she had an attorney. She was to be arraigned Wednesday afternoon on animal neglect charges. WOW!!! Some people are just creepy. So just to reiterate, she was found in a hotel room with lots of rabbits...like she was having a affair with them or has a nasty drug habit and was "chasing the white rabbit" as my buddy Grace once told me. Not only that...but OVER A HUNDRED REFRIDGERATED!!! I understand the appeal of rabbit fur (all too well) but this is just...is she with PETA? Why do they protest big companies & stage riots throw famous football players in jail for two years when there are super creepy horrible people like this in the world? THREE DAYS IN JAIL for this...and Michael Vick gets TWO YEARS for a few dozen puppies? And he had better legal representation than her crazy ass? I don't know if the laws are a little different in Oregon than Virginia or wherever...but come on. Anyway, let it be known that if you're going to refrigerate bunnies, you damn well had better eat them.

Still Think Smoking Pot is Cool? - A lot of studies have shown marijuana is not good for you. Almost as many as those that say that tobacco is quite possibly the most toxic substance on Earth (but damn it's smooth...and what America makes best). Mary Jane can fry the brain and contribute to psychosis. The latest one finds "convincing evidence" that marijuana smoke damages the genetic material DNA in ways that could increase the risk of cancer (that's right, DNA). Toxic substances in tobacco smoke can damage DNA and increase the risk of lung and other cancers. However, there has been uncertainty over whether marijuana smoke has the same effect. Scientists are especially concerned about the toxicity of acetaldehyde, present in both tobacco and marijuana. However, it has been difficult to measure DNA damage from acetaldehyde with conventional tests. Using a highly sensitive new method called modified mass spectrometry (did I mention that I was an engineer once?), Rajinder Singh at the University of Leicester and colleagues found the data they sought, they report in the June 15 issue of Chemical Research in Toxicology, a journal of the American Chemical Society. "These results provide evidence for the DNA damaging potential of cannabis [marijuana] smoke, implying that the consumption of cannabis cigarettes may be detrimental to human health with the possibility to initiate cancer development. The data obtained from this study suggesting the DNA damaging potential of cannabis smoke highlight the need for stringent regulation of the consumption of cannabis cigarettes, thus limiting the development of adverse health effects such as cancer." Earlier this year, a separate study found evidence that adolescents and young adults (your friends & family) who smoked a lot of marijuana are more likely than non-users to have disrupted brain development. Research in 2007 found pot smokers have on average a 41% increased risk of developing psychotic disorders later in life. The study was funded by the European Union Network of Excellence, the Medical Research Council and other groups. So there you are. Feel free to hypothesize that this is all a conspiracy to keep marijuana illegal...but yeah, this study is now out there. Just thought that I'd share that with you...and that Snoop Dogg apparently doesn't smoke marijuana anymore. Just throwing that out there too. He's high on life now.

Crop Circles Solved - The mystery of crop circles in poppy fields in Australia's southern island state of Tasmania has been solved...and it is that stoned wallabies are eating the poppy heads and hopping around in circles. I am not joking. Not aliens or pranksters or even whirlwinding Tasmanian devils...but stoned mini-kangaroos. "We have a problem with wallabies entering poppy fields, getting as high as a kite and going around in circles," the state's top lawmaker Lara Giddings told local media on Thursday. "Then they crash. We see crop circles in the poppy industry from wallabies that are high." Poppy producer Tasmanian Alkaloids said livestock which ate the poppies were known to "act weird" -- including deer and sheep in the state's highlands. "There have been many stories about sheep that have eaten some of the poppies after harvesting and they all walk around in circles," said field operations manager Rick Rockliff. Australia produces about 50% of the world's raw material for morphine and related opiates. Okay, so that explains Tasmanian crop circles (or at least that's what the government WANTS you to think) but what about in the United States? Is it stoned cattle who stumble upon some resourceful farmer's private stash of marijuana and strolling around the field in intricate patterns similar to the constellations overhead? Perhaps. Now, that we've found what's making those crop circles, let's get to how we can save those little devils that are dying off from some sort of plague. Maybe poppy seeds are the answer. Again, just throwing that out there.

Will F**k for Food - A woman has been fined $1,142 after pleading no contest to prostitution charges after she was accused of accepting a box of chips for sex. Police said they arrested 36-year-old Lahoma Sue Smith in southeast Oklahoma City after finding her in her car with a man who told officers he knew he could find a prostitute in the area (not exactly a bold challenge from what I hear). Smith told officers the man said he didn't have any money so she agreed to accept a $30 case of chips as payment. DEAL!!! The man was not charged and his name hasn't been released...but once again, the woman's name is Lahoma Sue Smith, just in case you missed it. That seems a little messed up if you ask me. Not the whole box of chips for sex...because that sounds f**king awesome and I plan on heading to Costco within the hour. What's messed up is that the guy's name isn't slandered all over the web. Seems unfair to me. Oh well...so yeah, box of chips? Anyone? Cheetos or Doritos? I've got both...and we can share. Anyone? Miss?

That'll do it for today. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to check in on the draft, big trades...and some concert thing later tonight. Have a great night everybody!!! ANYONE??? "Free" chips???

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