Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Blind Bastards Club

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

The roommate search went VERY well. Carmen was out of town for the first round… but she’s the one moving out so she didn’t need to be there. Before the interviews even started, I made a joke like “Dude, what if a stripper or a go-go dancer interviews? I can’t be held responsible if my natural instinctual reaction is ask if she plans on paying rent in singles & making it rain all over the place…” and Jackie D thought it was hilarious & said not to jinx it. Tracy, the 3rd roommate, did not think it was funny at all & got all nervous. I eased her concerns… but yeah, she’s kind of a wet blanket in nearly every single situation possible… but she’s alright & means well… just not a whole lot of fun thus far with her. I think she was an only child or something. Anyway, on to the interviews…

The first interview… we’ll call her McDavis… she was awesome. She brought cookies, found out that she & Tracy went to the same college, graduated a year apart, they even had mutual friends, her school / career choice was basically like mine (mechanic engineering to business), she’s a dinosaur nerd, works at Lucas Arts (Star Wars) & we all just got a great vibe off her. Basically at that point, I know that she was going to be Tracy’s favorite… and pretty much mine too… and there really wasn’t a scenario that I could fathom short of Megan Fox walking in the door (and even then, I’d just offer to share my room) that would be better for her. We chatted for like 45 minutes… and then she left. The cookies were delicious as well.

Next was Red, who arrived a little late (30 minutes or so) but she had a long commute from the other side of the bay. She was VERY cute… and a redhead (not natural I’m sure) and I remembered from her email that she was an esthetician / makeup artist / seamstress. So yeah, I like the way she was put together. She actually was surprisingly deep too… and she told us of her goals & background. Then the question came up on how she was planning to pay rent because she mentioned she was between gigs. “Well… you don’t need to worry about that because… I have… some money saved up, so rent won’t be a problem.” Jackie D & I glanced at each other thinking the same thing… somebody’s a stripper. I had to hold back my internal excitement & Jackie almost cracked up too. The questioning went on as the third person showed up on time, so they overlapped a bit. Basically, I thought she was pretty cool (and hot) and she thought we were BY FAR the coolest people she had met yet in her search, because apparently she had stories of weirdos where it involved meditation… or vegetarian nazis… and some creepy woman in her 50’s that basically told her “You shouldn’t have applied because I’m going to say no” “Then why did you invite me over?” So yeah… Tracy didn’t like her as much… but I think it’s because she asked about bringing friends over… and seriously, I don’t know what Tracy’s problem is… but she has to f**k up everybody’s day if it’s not what she wants. By the way, I have yet to mention Taco Tuesday to her… and I’m kind of wondering if I should even mention it. I will I’m sure… but yeah, she doesn’t seem to want anybody around the apartment… and that simply won’t happen. I’m not bringing the whole bar with me… but a friend or two WILL happen. I don’t care how awkward you make them feel in the first three seconds of meeting them (true story with Bubbles last week, we pass her leaving as we walked in the door, I introduce them – “Oh, nice to meet you. $teve has told me so much about you.” “WHAT? What exactly has he told you about me? We don’t even know each other.” Awkward silence… “No… nothing bad, just that you’re… a great roommate?” “Oh… okay, well, I’ve gotta go.”). Anyway…

The third girl Nurse was a nurse who is going to be working at Stanford Hospital (45 minutes away) but loves the Presidio area… and because she does 3-12 hour shifts, she figured it would be alright. She was very quiet, a little shy, but opened up towards the end when Jackie D & I went off on a little tangent about something. I see her as a roommate that I would probably never see because of her odd hours & sleeping or wandering around the city on her days off… but whatever, I liked her. Hell, I’d probably join her on a few journeys on my days off. I liked all of them really. So yeah, after the questions & what-not, Nurse expressed her interest & left.

Afterwards, we had the roommate discussion… and I started it off with “So… is anybody else thinking that Red is a stripper down on Broadway?” Jackie D & I went off for a while on that, “Dude, you totally called it before the interviews started. You must know your dancers.” “I thought she looked familiar…” blah blah blah. Tracy asked us to rank them… making sure that she put hers first saying that McDavis was amazing… then Nurse… and she didn’t like Red at all. Jackie D went same order… but liked Red. I pretty much agreed… because like I said, I liked them all… but McDavis seemed the best fit for us. There are a few more this weekend (maybe) but yeah… I’m thinking it’ll be McDavis getting the offer (unless Miss Fox shows up over the weekend) and then probably Nurse if that doesn’t go for whatever reason.

Friday night after work, Jackie D, Bubbles & I met up with some friends & coworkers at Grumpy’s for a few drinks & a French burger. Good times but a very packed place on a Friday night… so after a while Jackie D & I decided to go to The Final Final for some darts, billiards & drink. We even met a few people & Jackie D inadvertently tried to blind one of them. It happens.

Saturday was a rainy rainy day… so we decided to spend the day inside cleaning up a bit, then watching several Tyler Perry movies, which I had never seen before, but are actually pretty damn good. Based on the previews, I had thought they were all just the usual African-American comedies like “Friday” or “Good Sunday” or “Barbershop” or and that kind of stuff, but there’s actually very little comedy & more about life lessons. Totally unexpected. We watched “Madea Goes to Jail”, “I Can Do Bad All By Myself” and… another one I can’t remember off-hand… but they were all pretty good. I highly recommend them. The jokes are pretty funny… and the stories are universal. Go for it.

Saturday night, we were in the mood for karaoke (after dancing in a few music videos thanks to my projector TV & YouTube) so we went to the Silver Cloud restaurant & bar in the Marina. It was okay, but the weird thing was that it was pretty much standing room only, but there only seemed to be three people singing on the stage… and even then, you couldn’t really hear them, which I’m sure is probably a blessing… but yeah, odd place for karaoke in my personal opinion. Regardless, Jackie D & I had a fun time (Carmen didn’t come because she was exhausted from her trip & Tracy went out of town for the weekend) and we hit up Pizza Orgasmica for some late night grub afterwards.

Sunday morning, we had two more interviews for roommates. The first we’ll call New York. She was a little early (like it) and she seemed pretty nice. We chatted for a bit and everything was going fine… then she asked “What’s that sour smell?” Obviously I had no idea what they were talking about so I glanced at the roommates (Jackie D & Carmen) and they had no idea what she was talking about. “Well, we did just cook some eggs but… hmm, Febreze?” So then New York was wandering around the living room like a bloodhound, sniffing & looking for the cause, which I thought was helpful as hell… but the other roommates kinda looked at me like “What is going on right now?” No culprit was found… but we still blasted the room with Febreze just in case. Like I said, New York was nice & everything… but we’ve had a LOT of nice interviews. We’ll see how it goes.

Next was a girl that I’ll call… Belle. Now, when I received her reply for the room, I noticed that her email address was yahoo.fr, which as you may know… means she at least registered… as French. Having only communicated by email, I didn’t know what to expect. Oh yes… she was French… and she had the accent… and she made the pants stiffen by simply saying my name… and she wasn’t bad on the eyes either. So yeah, this interview was mainly conducted by the ladies as I just sat back & enjoyed the sweet love being made to my ear holes. It was a pretty standard interview besides that… and of course, I walked her out the door (because I hate to see you go… but I love to watch you leave). Sigh… so yeah, again the roommates liked her too. “What do you think, $teve?” “Sigh… I think I have a problem controlling myself around French women…” so yeah, I like the idea, but the roommates didn’t seem to be sold. She was also only looking short term (intern from France on a temporary work visa) but I’d probably be sick of her by then anyway.

After the interviews, the roommates & I were going to make a trek to Target for some essentials in mass quantities… and I found out that Bubbles needed a ride to her car (parties the night before) so we all packed up in Gretchen & headed out. For as lame as it sounds, we actually had a lot of fun. You wouldn’t think that three people who met each other for the first time three weeks ago would be as closely knit as us. Heck, after Target, we were having dinner at Tortilla Heights, and we were sharing life stories, nicknames, even tragedies & stuff. Usually this kind of trust & openness takes a lot of time… but yeah, we’ve been doing it for a week or so now. The sad thing is… Carmen is going to be moving out soon… and Jackie D may be right behind (fantastic job offer in Philly). One thing’s for sure though… if Tracy gets to pick one roommate, I’m going with Belle for my pick. I don’t care if she doesn’t have a job, we can share my room. “But how do I pay for ziss room?” “Mo’cher, just read some French to me in a sexy voice… and do it dossimo, do it… very slowly. Don’t rush it, oui?” “Oui.” Don’t judge me.

This weekend, we also decided to watch the new “The Karate Kid” starring Jaden Smith & Jackie Chan. As you know, I love the original… but I was pretty sure that the remake was going to be pretty good too. It actually was. The story starts out that a young boy Dre (Smith) & his mother are moving from Detroit to Beijing because the auto plant she works at transferred her there. By the way, side note: It mentioned in the beginning that Dre’s father died… but didn’t explain why or how… but being Detroit, my guess would be lead poisoning. Anyway, they move there… and the boy doesn’t like it… primarily because there’s a bully (and his gang) that pick on him because Dre has the hots for a cute Chinese girl. So yeah… eventually he wants to learn Kung Fu to fight back… but the place he wants to learn is where the bully learns… and the sensai’s a mean douche. Luckily there’s the wise maintenance man (Chan) who befriends & trains him… and strikes the legendary deal to have the kids back off Dre until they can fight in the tournament. You’ve all seen the original, right? Okay, so I’d say check it out. As far as a remake goes, it’s not that bad… and you get to see Beijing, which is an amazing city… and Jaden Smith has mannerisms & joke telling ability just like his dad the Fresh Prince… so yeah, it’s work a dollar rental. Check it out… speaking of Detroit…

A Reason to Visit Detroit – For hundreds of years, people have been trying to come up with a reason for visiting Detroit, the Musical Motor City. The city has had many peaks & valleys in its history… but two things have always rang true… those who live there are some of the hardest working people of this or any generation… and somebody’s going to get shot. Not exactly the kind of things that bring in big tourism money… but nonetheless part of their identity. Well now, ladies & gentlemen, there’s something that could very well change all of that. From sci-fi cult film, to Twitter phenomenon to Detroit landmark-in-the-making, plans for a statue honoring RoboCop, the half-man, half-machine crimefighter of the 1987 movie (and its sequels), are moving ahead after a group of artists and entrepreneurs in Detroit, Michigan raised more than $50,000 via Facebook and an online fund-raising site. "It hit a sweet spot. It's a fun and funny idea to build a statue of RoboCop," said Jeff Paffendorf, who helped lead the project inspired by a whimsical suggestion sent to Detroit Mayor Dave Bing via Twitter last week. Mayor Bing (Detroit Pistons basketball legend) tweeted back at the time that there were no plans for a RoboCop statue, an off-hand remark that bounced around the Internet and generated calls for him to reconsider. "There's violence in 'RoboCop,' but through the film RoboCop tries to do the right thing," Paffendorf said. Bing's office is still not convinced, but a spokeswoman said the city is studying how it could accept and display a gift RoboCop statue. "We know there are a lot of people that care deeply about the issue, and we respect that," said Karen Dumas of Bing's office. "But I'm still not sure that RoboCop is the best message for the city of Detroit." Paffendorf said the RoboCop statue could go somewhere downtown if the city approves, perhaps near the landmark fist statue honoring legendary boxer Joe Louis. That’s right… allow me to rephrase that a little bit. They may not allow a RoboCop statue… because there’s violence in the movie (and lots of it) BUT… there’s a possibility that it could be near an already-erected FIST statue… honoring legendary boxer Joe Louis. For those of you who are not aware, boxing is a sport in which two fully grown men strip down to shorts & a mouthguard… and pummel the hell out of each other for about an hour while millions around the world watch. Just to clarify. Regardless, even if Detroit will not allow RoboCop on city-owned land, a nonprofit arts group plans to display the statue, he said. Paffendorf said a sculptor and a metal artist have already been chosen to complete the job. So what do you think? Obviously I’m cool with the idea… but I want to name my first kid Murphy because that was RoboCop’s name… regardless of the child’s sex. I think it’s a great idea not unlike the Rocky Statue in Philadelphia… where the fictitious underdog stood with the giants & shined. RoboCop is the story of second chances. Officer Alex Murphy was a man who gave his life trying to protect the people of his city… but through the marvels of modern technology, he was given a second chance to continue protecting the innocent… and had plenty of guns at his disposal to do so. Detroit NEEDS RoboCop. Besides, I’d hate to drive completely out of my way on a visit to Chicago to find there’s no such statue & it was all BS. I already did that with Needles, CA and the alleged Sam Kinison statue. OH OH OHHHHH!!! So frustrating… but congratulations to the fund raisers on Kickstarter who got this done. Best of luck with finding the proper spot for such an icon… and kudos to Mayor Bing on helping them out too… which I’m sure he will do when all things are considered. Now if we can just get a Tony Montana statue in Miami we’d be set.

Judge Dredd Update – Speaking of bringing back violent comic based men of the law, actress Lena Headey (“300” & "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles") has joined the cast of the currently shooting "Dredd" reports JDMN. Headey, who began shooting her role in South Africa last week, will play the scarred Madeline Madrigal (a.k.a. Ma-Ma) who is the leader of a gang and the film's primary villain. She joins a cast that includes Karl Urban (“Star Trek” & “Pathfinder”) as Judge Dredd and Olivia Thirlby (“Juno”) as Cassandra Anderson. Pete Travis is directing from a script by Alex Garland and the film is currently targeting an early 2012 release. That is all.

Blind Bastards Club – In what can only be the next multiple Academy Award winning film extravaganza, Lenny Kravitz, Mickey Rourke, Rosario Dawson, Rodrigo Santoro and Riccardo Scamarcio are all attached to star in “The Blind Bastard Club” reports Screen Daily. The story follows a group of blind thrill-seekers who begin bar brawls, jump out of planes and pretend they’re not blind - all in order to live life on the edge. I’m thinking “The Bucket List” meets “Scent of a Woman” but with a lot more swearing & blood. The leader of the pack (I’m assuming Rourke) soon falls for a rollerblading call girl (mmm.. I’m praying it’s Dawson). Ash Baron-Cohen (”This Girl’s Life”) will direct the $6 million feature and shooting kicks off in Brazil in April. Frank Desmarais, Andrew Mysko and Cory Neal will produce. Now I know why they wanted to be in this movie… it’s filming in Brazil. Damn it! I’m in the wrong business. I could be filming in Brazil… or Hong Kong… or Prague… or even Vancouver. Oh wait… I already live in San Francisco… one of only three cities to have a $teve certified Movie List (New Orleans & Las Vegas are the others). It could make for a pretty good movie. We shall see.

Anyway, that should do it for this past weekend. The roommate decision is coming up soon… and Taco Tuesday tomorrow night, so bring all your friends. It’s really going to be a small gathering of roommates, neighbors & whoever else shows up so… yeah, we’ve got chicken, fixings, tortillas, cheese, various salsas, chips, sombreros & tequila. We almost bought a piñata at Target yesterday… but maybe another time. We’ll have to see how the inaugural TaTu goes. Have a great day everybody!!!

1 comment:

Blogger said...

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