Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
Halloween was pretty cool. I spent the day with my dad, helping him pick up a Bio Force weight machine that he bought through the Classifieds in Orem...and then watched some college football. After that, I went to a Halloween Party with a "Second String" theme, which basically means you don't dress as the star...but as the supporting character. There was Luigi from Super Mario Brothers, Rhoda from the Mary Tyler Moore Show, Steve Wozniak, the dead Golden Girls, and of course...Captain Hammer (who is a superhero...but not the titular character of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog...so it works). Oh...and there was a LOT of booze, which makes any Halloween party great. Also, on the long walk home (like 2-3 miles with a good buzz going), I was asked for a cigarette thrice, saw a taxi getting towed in a left turn lane (has to be a good story there) and a curvaceous drunken woman dressed as a Hooters girl did a wonderful little dance for me...while her boyfriend (or whatever) watched. I resisted the urge to throw dollars at her feet...but merely thanked her for the private dance and kept walking to my apartment. Very nice. Other than that though, not much to report. Had to work early this morning so...that sucked. Yeah. Here's the news...
Mugshot of the Week - Had to throw this in before the new crop of hilarious mugshots comes in from the holiday. Police had no trouble identifying two men accused of trying to break into a Carroll, Iowa apartment. Police were responding to a call about an attempted burglary when they pulled over a car matching the alleged suspects' vehicle. Inside the car, officers found two men with their faces blackened with permanent marker (yes, really). Police said the caller described two men with painted faces attempting to break into an apartment Friday night before driving off. Matthew McNelly, 23, and Joey Miller, 20, were arrested at gunpoint after officers were told they might be armed. Neither man had a weapon. McNelly and Miller were each charged with attempted second-degree burglary. Both men were released after posting bond. Attorneys for the men declined comment Tuesday. As if the mugshot wasn't hilarious enough, I can just imagine the call going out to all cars in the area. "Be on the lookout for two young males wanted for questioning with regards to an attempted robbery, early twenties, average height & build, painted faces, more than likely armed & dangerous." "Attention dispatch, Car 28 here. Did you say painted faces?" "Roger that, Car 28." "In what way is that NOT racist?" "Excuse me, Car 28." "Oh, I'm sorry. Are we back in 1920's Alabama? Should I check the local minstrel show?" "Car 28, the victim described the perps as having their faces painted. Possibly with magic marker." "(Silence) That's it, I'm calling Jesse Jackson."
Russian Road Roulette - Bulgarian prosecutors are investigating a new gambling game in which drivers defy death by speeding through red lights for bets of up to 5,000 Euros ($7,400), the chief prosecutor's office said Thursday. Known as 'Russian road roulette', the driver must jump red lights at busy intersections at high speed and not crash into any other cars or pedestrians, according to local media reports. Onlookers also gamble on the result (though I'm assuming keep a safe distance with that whole no hitting pedestrians thing). Prosecutors launched their investigation after media reported the new game had been held at night at busy crossroads in Sofia since the summer. In June, two people died after a motorcyclist crashed into an onlooker (oooh, guess not) at a similar rally on Sofia's ring road. "Every time we receive a signal for such an unregulated race, we send patrols," Commissioner Vanio Stoevski, head of the Sofia Road Police, told Reuters. Since the deaths in June, police have monitored roads where such races are typically held. Local media report that participants in the 'Russian road roulette' are informed via text messages of the venue for that particular night -- depending on the presence of police. Now THAT should be the next Fast & Furious sequel. On second thought, they'd find a way to ruin that too. Now, you may think that I'm a huge fan of this given my record of being in favor of everything from mixed martial arts to Extreme Golf to professional Rochambeau to the ultimate showdown between Grizzlies & Panda Bears for bear supremacy (and genetically engineering miniature dinosaurs just to have them fight for my amusement) but I'm not a huge fan of this...and the reason is fairly obvious. I do not like the danger to spectators, less innocent bystanders just trying to get home to their families. However, I'm totally down with the Death Race scenario...or maybe a bunch of obstacles and what have you. I don't want people to die during a competition or anything like that...but I do enjoy the element of danger...and at least the competitors know what's at stake. Innocent bystanders & stuff though, not cool. Yet another reason I have no desire to go to Bulgaria. "Here is your map of the city of Sofia with directions to some of the attractions. Also, would you like the Russian Road Roulette Insurance Plan with your rental car this trip?" "Do I want what now?" Keep an eye out for the movie based on these events. I'm pretty sure Jason Statham will star in it...or Vin Diesel...or some other bald guy. Patrick Stewart?
Governator Update - Speaking of Running Man, I thought this article was a little funny. From "I'll be Back" to "Hasta La Vista, Baby", Arnold Schwarzenegger has always had a way with words...but the charismatic California governor raised more than a few eyebrows with the wording of a recent letter to a political opponent announcing his intention to veto financing for a San Francisco waterfront project. Viewed as a letter, Republican Schwarzenegger's missive to San Francisco assemblyman Tom Ammiano, a Democrat, appeared to convey a not-so-hidden message. Read vertically, the first letter of each line spelt an obscene two-word insult, the first word beginning with "F" and the second word being "You." Coincidence? Local media reports speculated that the message was the result of Ammiano's recent heckling of Schwarzenegger at a Democratic gala event. Ammiano, who is gay, was reportedly angry at Schwarzenegger over state budget cuts which slashed funding to AIDS programs. However Schwarzenegger's spokesman Aaron McClear said Wednesday that the odd wording was nothing more than a quirk of coincidence. "It was a strange coincidence. We draft hundreds of letters each year and it was just a coincidence, nothing more to it than that." Really? What a crazy random happenstance! Some of you may think that Arnie is not nearly clever enough to do something like that...but let me tell you something, he very well may be the smartest man in the entire world. Seriously. Think about it. This man is RICH!!! He's an Austrian immigrant who came here thirty years ago with a twenty dollar bill in his pocket...and became the biggest actor EVER, married into American Royalty, and is the governor of California...and he's not done yet (stay tuned). Also, he's surrounded with clever out-of-work movie & TV series writers to draft letters for him...so that he can do subtle jabs at his opponents...when his dominating presence isn't enough. So maybe it's coincidence. Maybe he got caught trying to be a little clever. Regardless, who cares? If I end up moving to Lake Tahoe...then I'd be proud to have Arnold as my elected representative. He doesn't take crap from anybody...nor should he have to. Oh...and if you're ever looking for some kind of clever jab or anything in my blog, you'll be sorely disappointed. First off, I'm not that clever. Secondly, I'm usually pretty blunt & straight-forward about it...because I feel that if I try to hide it in a clever manner, then the stupid sh*t I'm trying to insult won't catch it. I'm an excellent communicator that way. Hmm, I haven't mentioned Terrell Owens for a while. Oh yeah, that's because he hasn't been relevant for a few years now. I wonder how cold it is in Buffalo this week. See? Boom. Done. Jab delivered.
Anyway, that'll do it for tonight. The Eagles just destroyed the Giants so I'm going to catch some of the highlights now that I'm off work. Perhaps this week will bear more fruit on the whole Lake Tahoe situation...but I'm not holding my breathe or anything right now. I'm sure it's still a few weeks away if at all. However, join me tomorrow for a special occasion...my 700th posting on web-based journal. I know, right? 700 rants and counting...and I promise that this entry...will be quite fantastic. I already happen to know a few stories that'll be in it...and it just gives me good feelings thinking about it...but then again, anything involving Megan Fox & fellatio will do that to just about anybody. Have a great day everybody!!!
P.S. I'm sorry to tease like that and put you in a hot & bothered state...but just wait until tomorrow.
Halloween was pretty cool. I spent the day with my dad, helping him pick up a Bio Force weight machine that he bought through the Classifieds in Orem...and then watched some college football. After that, I went to a Halloween Party with a "Second String" theme, which basically means you don't dress as the star...but as the supporting character. There was Luigi from Super Mario Brothers, Rhoda from the Mary Tyler Moore Show, Steve Wozniak, the dead Golden Girls, and of course...Captain Hammer (who is a superhero...but not the titular character of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog...so it works). Oh...and there was a LOT of booze, which makes any Halloween party great. Also, on the long walk home (like 2-3 miles with a good buzz going), I was asked for a cigarette thrice, saw a taxi getting towed in a left turn lane (has to be a good story there) and a curvaceous drunken woman dressed as a Hooters girl did a wonderful little dance for me...while her boyfriend (or whatever) watched. I resisted the urge to throw dollars at her feet...but merely thanked her for the private dance and kept walking to my apartment. Very nice. Other than that though, not much to report. Had to work early this morning so...that sucked. Yeah. Here's the news...
Mugshot of the Week - Had to throw this in before the new crop of hilarious mugshots comes in from the holiday. Police had no trouble identifying two men accused of trying to break into a Carroll, Iowa apartment. Police were responding to a call about an attempted burglary when they pulled over a car matching the alleged suspects' vehicle. Inside the car, officers found two men with their faces blackened with permanent marker (yes, really). Police said the caller described two men with painted faces attempting to break into an apartment Friday night before driving off. Matthew McNelly, 23, and Joey Miller, 20, were arrested at gunpoint after officers were told they might be armed. Neither man had a weapon. McNelly and Miller were each charged with attempted second-degree burglary. Both men were released after posting bond. Attorneys for the men declined comment Tuesday. As if the mugshot wasn't hilarious enough, I can just imagine the call going out to all cars in the area. "Be on the lookout for two young males wanted for questioning with regards to an attempted robbery, early twenties, average height & build, painted faces, more than likely armed & dangerous." "Attention dispatch, Car 28 here. Did you say painted faces?" "Roger that, Car 28." "In what way is that NOT racist?" "Excuse me, Car 28." "Oh, I'm sorry. Are we back in 1920's Alabama? Should I check the local minstrel show?" "Car 28, the victim described the perps as having their faces painted. Possibly with magic marker." "(Silence) That's it, I'm calling Jesse Jackson."
Russian Road Roulette - Bulgarian prosecutors are investigating a new gambling game in which drivers defy death by speeding through red lights for bets of up to 5,000 Euros ($7,400), the chief prosecutor's office said Thursday. Known as 'Russian road roulette', the driver must jump red lights at busy intersections at high speed and not crash into any other cars or pedestrians, according to local media reports. Onlookers also gamble on the result (though I'm assuming keep a safe distance with that whole no hitting pedestrians thing). Prosecutors launched their investigation after media reported the new game had been held at night at busy crossroads in Sofia since the summer. In June, two people died after a motorcyclist crashed into an onlooker (oooh, guess not) at a similar rally on Sofia's ring road. "Every time we receive a signal for such an unregulated race, we send patrols," Commissioner Vanio Stoevski, head of the Sofia Road Police, told Reuters. Since the deaths in June, police have monitored roads where such races are typically held. Local media report that participants in the 'Russian road roulette' are informed via text messages of the venue for that particular night -- depending on the presence of police. Now THAT should be the next Fast & Furious sequel. On second thought, they'd find a way to ruin that too. Now, you may think that I'm a huge fan of this given my record of being in favor of everything from mixed martial arts to Extreme Golf to professional Rochambeau to the ultimate showdown between Grizzlies & Panda Bears for bear supremacy (and genetically engineering miniature dinosaurs just to have them fight for my amusement) but I'm not a huge fan of this...and the reason is fairly obvious. I do not like the danger to spectators, less innocent bystanders just trying to get home to their families. However, I'm totally down with the Death Race scenario...or maybe a bunch of obstacles and what have you. I don't want people to die during a competition or anything like that...but I do enjoy the element of danger...and at least the competitors know what's at stake. Innocent bystanders & stuff though, not cool. Yet another reason I have no desire to go to Bulgaria. "Here is your map of the city of Sofia with directions to some of the attractions. Also, would you like the Russian Road Roulette Insurance Plan with your rental car this trip?" "Do I want what now?" Keep an eye out for the movie based on these events. I'm pretty sure Jason Statham will star in it...or Vin Diesel...or some other bald guy. Patrick Stewart?
Governator Update - Speaking of Running Man, I thought this article was a little funny. From "I'll be Back" to "Hasta La Vista, Baby", Arnold Schwarzenegger has always had a way with words...but the charismatic California governor raised more than a few eyebrows with the wording of a recent letter to a political opponent announcing his intention to veto financing for a San Francisco waterfront project. Viewed as a letter, Republican Schwarzenegger's missive to San Francisco assemblyman Tom Ammiano, a Democrat, appeared to convey a not-so-hidden message. Read vertically, the first letter of each line spelt an obscene two-word insult, the first word beginning with "F" and the second word being "You." Coincidence? Local media reports speculated that the message was the result of Ammiano's recent heckling of Schwarzenegger at a Democratic gala event. Ammiano, who is gay, was reportedly angry at Schwarzenegger over state budget cuts which slashed funding to AIDS programs. However Schwarzenegger's spokesman Aaron McClear said Wednesday that the odd wording was nothing more than a quirk of coincidence. "It was a strange coincidence. We draft hundreds of letters each year and it was just a coincidence, nothing more to it than that." Really? What a crazy random happenstance! Some of you may think that Arnie is not nearly clever enough to do something like that...but let me tell you something, he very well may be the smartest man in the entire world. Seriously. Think about it. This man is RICH!!! He's an Austrian immigrant who came here thirty years ago with a twenty dollar bill in his pocket...and became the biggest actor EVER, married into American Royalty, and is the governor of California...and he's not done yet (stay tuned). Also, he's surrounded with clever out-of-work movie & TV series writers to draft letters for him...so that he can do subtle jabs at his opponents...when his dominating presence isn't enough. So maybe it's coincidence. Maybe he got caught trying to be a little clever. Regardless, who cares? If I end up moving to Lake Tahoe...then I'd be proud to have Arnold as my elected representative. He doesn't take crap from anybody...nor should he have to. Oh...and if you're ever looking for some kind of clever jab or anything in my blog, you'll be sorely disappointed. First off, I'm not that clever. Secondly, I'm usually pretty blunt & straight-forward about it...because I feel that if I try to hide it in a clever manner, then the stupid sh*t I'm trying to insult won't catch it. I'm an excellent communicator that way. Hmm, I haven't mentioned Terrell Owens for a while. Oh yeah, that's because he hasn't been relevant for a few years now. I wonder how cold it is in Buffalo this week. See? Boom. Done. Jab delivered.Anyway, that'll do it for tonight. The Eagles just destroyed the Giants so I'm going to catch some of the highlights now that I'm off work. Perhaps this week will bear more fruit on the whole Lake Tahoe situation...but I'm not holding my breathe or anything right now. I'm sure it's still a few weeks away if at all. However, join me tomorrow for a special occasion...my 700th posting on web-based journal. I know, right? 700 rants and counting...and I promise that this entry...will be quite fantastic. I already happen to know a few stories that'll be in it...and it just gives me good feelings thinking about it...but then again, anything involving Megan Fox & fellatio will do that to just about anybody. Have a great day everybody!!!
P.S. I'm sorry to tease like that and put you in a hot & bothered state...but just wait until tomorrow.
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