Trust Me, Written Before Disneyland

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, tomorrow after work, I’m going to Disneyland with the family including the niece & nephew… which will prove to be an EPIC vacation… and much needed after the past few months of constant busyness… but business & busyness go hand in hand, right? In the words of the great Shawn Carter, “I’m not a business man, I’m a business, man!” It’s just how it goes. Let’s see, what can I catch you up on?

Saturday, I went out to Point Albany by the race tracks with Dizzy. When San Francisco had the great quake of 1906 and rebuilt most of the buildings, they took the rubble from the old buildings and put them at this Point Albany, making a man-made reef or sorts. Now it’s a sanctuary for the burrowing owl population (yes, owls that burrow… they exist apparently… which is like a flying squirrel to me). Also, there are lovely trails with views of the bay, including Alcatraz, Angel Island, Sausalito & the city across the way… and a lot of “found art” throughout the park, statues & sculptures made out of some of the refuse that’s actually quite amazing. There’s also a homeless population there living in tent cities… but hey, I can’t blame them. It looks like it would be absolutely magnificent for a last resort. Here are some pictures…

After walking around there, Dizzy & I went back to her place and watched the first few episodes of “Ducktales” which I hadn’t seen in many a year. There are some things about that cartoon that I don’t think that you could get away with nowadays thanks to political correctness. Some bad accents & stereotypes… but hey, I like it… and we had a good time making observations about the show. By the way, you know that Scrooge McDuck is the richest fictional character in the world, right? This has been documented by Forbes. And to think… it’s all from the luck bestowed on him by his first dime. Think about that. Anyway, now I have to teach Dizzy about the greatest kids show that nobody has ever seen besides me apparently – “Captain Power & the Soldiers of the Future!!!” Luckily, I have the DVDs. Thanks eBay! That evening, I helped my buddy J-Mo with a fundraiser for his independent movie… and it went well, but nothing really to elaborate on about that. I’m sure it’ll be a great flick… because one thing I know about J-Mo is that when he sets his mind on something, I’m putting my money on it. He’s got great motivation, work ethic, discipline & just an overall great guy. Hopefully coming to a theatre near you soon.

Sunday, I didn’t do a whole lot except clean house, play “Assassin's Creed II” (finished it by the way) & then played basketball in the evening… and get this… WE WON!!! We would’ve dominated a LOT more… but again, I think the referees have it in for us. Seriously. We were playing great defense and built a 20 point lead… and then we kept going… but then I noticed that after making three shots in a row, the lead was down to 14. In other words, they had put the last three buckets for the wrong team. So I went over to the score keeper & ref to let them know… and they were like, “Oh yeah, we took care of it.” Score was the same… “Nah, it doesn’t look like you did. I’m on the team that was up by 20. We’ve been dominating this thing… and now it’s 14 & they haven’t even scored. I scored. Remember? Three shots in a row? Sweet baby hook? Number one blue?” Apparently falling on deaf ears… whatever. Then after that, we tried a few different lineups & fouls weren’t getting called for me anymore… and yeah, we still won by like 4 in the end but… conspiracy? We shall see.

Also Sunday, I watched “Killer Elite” starring Jason Statham, Robert DeNiro & Clive Owen. It’s a spy movie about a man (Statham) who “retired” to the Australian outback because he was sick of the life he had chosen as a mercenary spy (and he ran into “Chuck” superhottie Yvonne Strahovski). Well, he gets pulled back into it when a sheikh from Oman takes his mentor (DeNiro) hostage & says that he wants him to kill the three other assassins that killed his sons… and of course he’ll be compensated $6 million, his mentor was just to make sure he’d do it or something. Anyway, it goes from there… and then another mercenary (Owen) from a different faction sees that a few of his people are getting off’d… and tries to catch & stop the others. Throw in Dominic Purcell (“Prison Break”) with bad hair & moustache, set it in the early 80’s, base it on a true story, couple twists & turns along the way… and poof, you’ve got a pretty good little thriller. I say check it out if that’s your thing… but definitely not a must see.

So Tuesday night… I was going through the Netflix… and I stumbled upon this documentary called “Best Worst Movie” and it intrigued me… because as you know, I have a thing for really bad movies… so I watched it. Have you ever heard of the movie “Troll 2”? I had heard about it on worst movie lists & stuff… but didn’t know too much about it. Well, this documentary is directed by the child star of that cinematic abortion… and he tries to reunite the cast, director, crew, etc as there’s a certain cult of people out there who absolutely love this movie in a kind of Rocky Horror Picture Show way, where it’s so bad that it’s good. Now, let me give you some interesting points about this movie that I picked up… and further intrigued me…

1. It received a 0 rating on Rotten Tomatoes. Very few movies have done that…
2. The movie was filmed in Slick City & Bubbles’ hometown of Heber, Utah… but she’s never heard of it
3. The director, writer & crew were all Italian and didn’t speak English with the exception of one of the grips or something… so there was a communication barrier.
4. Due to that barrier, the actors wanted to adjust the dialogue because it was quirky at best when translated… but the director refused saying “Stick to the script!”
5. The actors used auditioned for extra roles… but ended up getting the leads because… well, no one really knows.
6. Several of the actors were certifiably insane. No joke.
7. The father has a REALLY bad Alabama accent
8. Fun fact: Troll 2 has absolutely nothing to do with the original Troll movie. In fact, there are no trolls in the movie. The working title was “Goblins” and the creatures are referred to as goblins throughout the entire movie. Sure, you may say that’s just a problem of semantics or something… but putting it all together, it’s kind of funny.
9. You really need to see how bad the goblin/troll costumes are.
10. Most quoted line from this movie: “You don’t piss on hospitality… I won’t allow it!” If that’s not enough… I’ve got no help for ya…
    
    

After seeing the documentary though… I REALLY want to see this movie… but not alone. I’ve mentioned it to several people over the past few days… and I’m thinking about throwing a Troll 2 Movie Party sometime soon. Maybe when C-Real comes to visit in April. I’ve already got RSVPs from Batgirl, Dizzy, C-Real & Bubbles so… it’s on!!! Just need to find a date that works… and make sure that I don’t see the movie before then… so it has to be quick. I’ll keep you posted. Also, I’m thinking that I’ll have to follow this movie up with a few episodes of “Captain Power & the Soldiers of the Future” to introduce everybody to that too. You know… since the movie’s only 90 minutes and I party all night long.

Anyway, off to Disneyland now & I’ll have some great pictures & stories for you when I come back. Have a great weekend everybody!!!