Sunday, August 25, 2013

The Winter of Our Diss Contest

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
Well… once again, I’ve recently been inspired. Still doing the comic book thing (slowly but surely since… well, I can’t draw), writing up a storm, character development, twists, storyboarding, all that fun stuff (at least fun to me). However, the brew-making thing has really been triggered, so I’m getting started on that too to see how it goes. Starting small scale… but I’ve already got a plan in place for… let’s just say slightly larger plans. However, I do know that there’s a LOT of steps between now & the goal… but I’m not going to get there just thinking about it.
Another thing… apparently I’ve got to get to all of this quick because… well, just read these stories of TERROR!!!
Utah Apocalypse Update - Firefighters arrived at a Utah home to put out a blaze started by a kitchen range and discovered more than flames — 28 snakes, six of them deadly. The man didn't have a permit for the six venomous snakes (five rattlers and a gaboon viper) and he may face misdemeanor charges for keeping them without a permit. The viper, native to Africa, is considered one of the most dangerous in the world with potent venom. The snakes were inside cages in a separate room and were removed as firefighters quickly put out the blaze on Friday in Clearfield, about 30 miles north of Salt Lake City (and about two miles from my junior high school). "I don't think firefighters were ever in danger from the snakes, except for the creep factor," said North Davis Fire Chief Mark Becraft. The poisonous snakes were confiscated by the Utah Division of Wildlife, where Capt. Tony Wood was trying to determine their fate… and whether to cite the owner. "I'm just trying to wrap my head around the situation," he said Monday. Fire and smoke damage left the man's duplex uninhabitable, Becraft said, but all the snakes survived. The owner took his 22 other legal snakes for safekeeping to his father's house, Davis County Animal Control Director Clint Thacker said. The seized rattlers will probably be released into the wild, and the viper could be sent to someone authorized to have it, said Jim Dix of Reptile Rescue of Tooele County. Repeat: The poisonous snakes will be released back into the wild… because it’s not safe for them to be in the hands of an unlicensed snake owner… who already has a few dozen snakes. The owner has been described variously by officials as a snake professional or breeder. Dix said the snakes were well fed, in good condition and that there was no threat to anyone in the neighborhood… so obviously they can only put them back into the wild. "We are seeing a big increase in illegal animals in Utah. It just goes on and on." That’s just racist! Oh wait, he’s still talking about snakes… I think. Dix said he was working with Utah officials to designate "amnesty" days for unlicensed owners who are willing to turn over exotic animals (for sell to licensed owners that they pocket I’m sure). Earlier this year, Cottonwood Heights police cited a young man for failure to have an exotic pet permit and initially ordered him to get rid of all but one of his 29 boa constrictors he kept in special room in his basement with top-of-the-line cages. The Cottonwood Heights City Council later gave him a reprieve, allowing Thomas Cobb to keep his snakes while officials revisit the city code. Cobb still has the snakes he says are worth $12,000 apiece, and is waiting a resolution from city officials, Cottonwood Heights Police Sgt. Mark Askerlund said. That’s about $350,000 if that’s really the value (though I doubt it). F**k, maybe breeding the Apocalypse is the business to be in… or perhaps these simple men are being FORCED to breed the New Army! Those unsuspecting fools (aka cops) are walking right into a trap by releasing the most deadly of them back into the wild… my God, it’s a brilliant plan! These f**king snakes are getting smarter every day! And the news is backing it all up…
Apocalypse Ninjas - The deaths of two young boys who police believe were killed by an African rock python while they slept at a friend’s apartment has rattled the northern New Brunswick city of Campbellton where the children were remembered Tuesday as fun-loving free spirits. Noah and Connor Barthe, aged four and six, were found dead Monday morning after the 45-kilogram snake escaped its enclosure in the apartment, slithered through a ventilation system above and fell through a ceiling into the living room where they were sleeping, police said. Their uncle said the boys were spending the day with family friend Jean-Claude Savoie, who took them shopping and to a farm (those mysterious ones from the declaration form?) where they played with lamas, goats, horses, dogs and cats before they returned to his apartment for a sleepover. Paul (Little Ray) Goulet, founder and co-owner of Little Ray’s Reptile Zoo in Ottawa, said snakes don’t recognize humans as a source of food, but if the children smelled like animals, it could explain an attack. “If a snake sees an animal moving, giving off heat and smells like a goat, what is it? It’s a goat. This is the reasonable explanation of how this has happened is that they had been playing with farm animals, they did smell like their prey items and the snake sadly enough mistook them as a food item when they weren’t.” Relatives and friends of the boys and their family said they could not fathom what happened. “It’s like a bad dream,” said Shawna MacEachern, who has been a friend of the boys’ mother, Mandy Trecartin, since childhood. “She loved her babies. They meant everything to her. She was an awesome mother. They were both so sweet. They were fun-loving typical little boys.” The Royal Canadian Mounted Police (as seen in “Due South”) said the boys were found dead Monday at around 6:30 a.m. in an apartment located above Reptile Ocean, an exotic pet store. The Mounties initially said that the 4.3-metre long snake escaped from the store at some point during the night, but on Tuesday Sgt. Alain Tremblay said it escaped its floor-to-ceiling glass tank inside the apartment through a vent, allowing it to escape through a ventilation pipe… but the snake’s weight (about a hundred pounds) caused the pipe to collapse and fall into the living room where the boys slept on a mattress, Tremblay said. The RCMP said Monday they believe the snake strangled the boys, but Tremblay said Tuesday investigators are waiting for the results of an autopsy on the children as well as a necropsy on the snake before commenting further on the cause of death. Asked why anyone in the apartment didn’t appear to have heard anything, Tremblay said that was still under investigation. “It’s something the investigators are going to talk to people about and we are not there yet,” he said. The snake was later captured by Savoie, who also owns Reptile Ocean. It was later put down by a veterinarian and sent for a necropsy in Fredericton to help determine what may have prompted it to attack the boys, Tremblay said, adding that the RCMP have enlisted the help of a reptile expert from the Magnetic Hill Zoo in Moncton, N.B., for their investigation. This story is REALLY fish... but a truly tragic story… and not just for the death of two small boys… but that these monsters are taking them out two at a time… and stealthy… like giant scaly ninja dragons! I tell ya, they’re getting smarter… and bigger… and DEADLIER!!! Soon they won’t even need ventilation ducts… they’ll make their own…

Apocalypse Sinkhole - A sinkhole has caused a section of a Florida resort villa near Disney World to partially collapse, while another section of the villa is sinking, authorities say. About 30% of the three-storey structure collapsed before dawn last Monday, Lake County Fire Rescue Battalion Chief Tony Cuellar said. The villa at the Summer Bay Resort had been evacuated, and no injuries were reported. The sinkhole was about 12 to 15 metres in diameter, Cuellar said. The villa houses 24 units, and about 20 people were staying in it, Cuellar said. Authorities were called to the scene, about 16 kilometres west of Disney World, late on Sunday and found that the building was making popping sounds and windows were breaking. In an interview aired on ABC's Good Morning America, Maggie Ghamry, a guest at the resort, said that when she first heard the noises, she thought it might be kids running down the hall. "Next thing I know, people are yelling, 'Get out of the building, get out of the building'," she said. A large crack was visible at the building's base. Luis Perez, who was staying at a villa near the sinking one, said he was in his room when the lights went off around 11.30pm on Sunday. He said he was on his way to the front desk to report the outage when he saw firefighters and police outside. "You could see the building leaning, and you could see a big crack at the base of the building," he said. Florida has a long problem with sinkholes, which cause millions of dollars in damage annually. On March 1, a sinkhole underneath a house swallowed a man who was in his bed. His body was never recovered. Where does a sinkhole come from? Scientists may tell you one thing… but I think we all know that it’s yet another weapon on the utility belt of the Serpent Army… burrowing and digging out the foundations of buildings with their great strength & plentiful numbers in Florida. I’m sure amongst the pops & cracking noises… there was plenty of hissing as well. Sure, you say “Yeah… probably a ruptured gas line” and you may be correct… but will that console you when you’re in the belly of a python? I think not…
Anyway, that should do it for today. Just us next time when we… well, it’s a surprise… to us all. Have a great weekend everybody!!!

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