Saturday, June 30, 2012

Basketball's Christmas 2012

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
Sigh… I know… I know… I’m getting lazy with this thing. Hey now, I’ve just got a lot on my platter & yet it feels like I’m not doing much. How bad is it? Thursday night was Basketball’s Christmas & I went to a baseball game. A BASEBALL GAME!!! Also, it was my second of the week. I know, it's scary... but hey, it's just the draft. WHAT AM I SAYING??? The draft is how champions are made. "But $teve, what about the recently crowned Miami Heat? All of their big names are free agents." Yeah? Where do you think LeBron, Dwayne & Bosh 1.0 met? Where? What was that? Oh yeah... the f**king 2003 NBA Draft where they were three of the top 5 picks (along with Carmelo & Darko). FACE!!! Anyway, on top of that… then my mom’s coming to visit for the 4th of July. SURPRISE!!! She's on her way driving through the barren wasteland of Nevada right now. Okay, so what have I been up to since the last entry?
Last weekend, I hung out with Dizzy & she introduced me to something new… something exciting… something that may or may not completely change my life… and that is… IKEA!!! I had never been before… but that place is pretty f**king amazing. For those who haven't been... it's basically where you can get all kinds of basic furniture for storage, functional or any other kind of purpose (though it's not really going to be any artistic fancy stuff made from oak & rich mahogany). There's also some cute little things for decorating... but it's an epic large scale adventure (we spent over 5 hours there & I'm not one for wandering through a BS store) and they even have a place half way through for dining... well, eating... but the buffalo chicken wraps & meatballs are pretty f**king amazing for a furniture store. Anyway, I highly recommend checking that out. Oh... and what did I get? Let's see... I didn't take measurements of my room beforehand so it was just a few things like a man sized robe for $20, some risers for the downstairs sofa (pick it up 5-6 inches), a hanging clothes compartment, some crown royal purple suit covers, & a magnet board for in the kitchen (our fridge was getting overrun). When I go back, daddy may be getting some shelves for his limited space... and finally going vertical with his storage. God help us all...
Tuesday night was a Giants game versus the Los Angeles Dodgers... and if you'll remember, I got those tickets from winning the auction at Sharky Rescue 2012 about a month or so back. This was also Dizzy's first time visiting AT&T Park... so it was doubly special. Our tickets were lower bowl along the left field line... and the game was pretty amazing. Before it starts, pitcher Matt Cain was award the key to the city of San Francisco as he threw a perfect game two weeks earlier. I've always wondered what those thing really opened. They seem too big for most keyholes... but then again, we all have experience with that problem, am I right guys? Eh? Too big... for keyholes... I'm talking about penis & vagina... it's a metaphor... f**k, never mind, I'm an idiot. Anyway, the game was pretty good... and the Giants won 2-0.
Then Thursday night, Dizzy's friend who she hadn't seen in a while called her up... and offered tickets to the Cincinatti Reds Game at AT&T Park... so we went to that too. What happened? Well, another part of that Giants package was an autographed baseball by Madison Bumgarner... who was pitching for the Giants... and he threw a complete game one hitter shutout, which is pretty f**king cool... and the Giants won 5-0. It was their 4th straight shutout... and we were there for two of them. Sweet! Also, I met her friend Donovan & he's cool as hell.
Friday night was my work's little unofficial Summer Kickoff party at Jillian's... so we went out, played some pool, had some drinks, ate some fine niblets like sliders, calamari, bruschetta, etc but I called it a pretty early night because I had been out a few times this week & wasn't sleeping well. Also, I was in my work clothes yet again so that played a part... but it was great hanging out with the coworkers for a few hours. That pretty much brings us to today, where my mom is en route... but without my niece & nephew because my brother (completely expectedly) decided to go rogue douche... and I'm frantically trying to clean up so it doesn't look like an oversexed teenage bachelor lives in my apartment. That basically brings us to what you've all been waiting for...

Basketball’s Christmas

This is my annual look in the NBA Draft... as I seem to think I know a little bit about basketball... and I make predictions & observations about the picks. If you're new, please feel free to check out my past entries & see how I've done with my predictions. In the meantime, here's what I noticed this year (after checking the outcome since I didn't watch the actual draft):

1. New Orleans - Anthony Davis (center from Kentucky) - Everybody knew that AD was going to be the number one pick... even before Commissioner Stern rigged the draft lottery. What? Oh yeah... Commissioner Stern, I know you get off on running this league like your own private fantasy league... but seriously, if you want to prove all the naysayers who call you on your bluffs wrong... it's very f**king simple, just hold the lottery LIVE!!! You have nothing to hide, right? I thought so, don't take it out on Jim Rome cuz you a b**ch. I'm not even a Rome fan... but still, deal with it when you're called on it. What's my point? Oh yeah, back to Davis. Yeah, he's already a great defender, rebounder, and can actually shoot decent. For a 19 year old kid whose still growing into his seven foot body that magically appeared over the summer (puberty will do that) who knows how tall he'll be a few years from now. Also, the pickup of the Son of Doc, Austin Rivers from Duke with the 10th pick might be good... but then again, he might be all hype. I'll go with decent shooter because he has the size, the attitude & the shot to be the next Ray Allen if he puts his mind to it. Two potential starters for this team depending on how the Eric Gordon thing goes.

2. Charlotte - Michael Kidd-Gilchrist (forward from Kentucky) - Wildcats make the top two picks (there will be five or so before the draft is over) but I like MKG. He's hard working, good size, and he just wins. Well... at least until he lands in Charlotte & realizes how completely f**king that franchise is... but hey, they HAVE to win more than last year... and besides, he may be the savior that finally ends that pesky 23 game losing streak that the team had to finish last year. Seriously, why doesn't Commissioner Stern do something about this team? Is he just trying to rub it in Michael Jordan's face or something?

3. Washington - Bradley Beal (guard from Florida) - I didn't see too much of this guy... but apparently he's one of the best slashers in the college game, can shoot & has good size. The team over in Washington looks like it might be pretty good with John Wall, him, Nene & Emeka Okafor... plus with last year's pick Jan Vesely & his recently drafted Czech friend Tomas Satoransky, they have a dynamic duo of dunkin' Czech swingers... er, swingmen. Okay, they'll probably still kinda suck... but give them a few years, we'll see.

4. Cleveland - Dion Waiters (guard from Syracuse) - Okay... I don't know what the f**k to think about the Cavs & how they draft. I saw Waiters play... and yes, he's a pretty good shooter, though undersized for the pro game... but here's my thing... he didn't even start on his college team. Which means, at best, he was the 6th best player on a Big East basketball team... so HOW is he the 4th best player in all of college basketball? I think you f**ked up this pick royally Cleveland (and I keep thinking about Jonny Flynn when Minnesota drafted him a few years ago when they already had an abundance of point guards, is David Kahn with the Cavs now?) but hey, prove me wrong. Is Tristan Thompson, last year's #4 pick any good? I haven't seen him in the pros yet. Apparently the Cavs aren't worth watching on TV without LeBron. That being said, I kinda like their pickup of UNC center Tyler Zeller with the 17th pick because they could use some talented height... but did they need to trade three picks in to get him? I don't know. Probably not... but whatever, we shall see.

5. Sacramento - Thomas Robinson (forward from Kansas) - In my opinion, second best player in the draft falls to Sactown at number five... and I'm sure they'll find a way to f**k it up... but in the meantime, great rebounder, great defender, talented in the post, great attitude & work ethic... I like him a lot... like a David West kind of player before David got paid & hurt. Great pick!

6. Portland - Damian Lillard (guard from WEBER STATE) - YES, B**CHES!!! IT'S OFFICAL!!! WEBER STATE FINALLY HAS A LOTTERY PICK TO MAKE THEM AN OFFICIAL UNIVERSITY!!! CITY OF OGDEN, THROW YOUR MUTHA F**KIN HANDS UP!!! Anyway, so yeah... I haven't seen much of Mr. Lillard since I haven't been to the Dee Events Center (if it's still called that) since Harold Arceneaux was in the house... and the highlights that I see are all against Big Sky conference opponents that I used to play pickup games against... but he appears to be fast, can shoot with the best of them, unlimited distance, and not gonna lie... I was kind of hoping that he'd fall to the 7th pick so that the native son of Oakland & man of Ogden could come back to play for the Warriors... but hey, he should be a good fit in Portland too. Hopefully better than Jerryd Bayless anyway. Also, picking up Illinois center Meyers Leonard basically game him the kiss of death with being a big guy in the NBA. Portland just destroys them. Remember when Sam Bowie was picked before MJ? Bill Walton lasted a few years before he was destroyed? They picked Greg Oden before Kevin Durant? Yeah, I know I thought Oden would prove them all wrong & there's still time... but yeah, unless he leads them to 3-4 rings, I'm gonna look kinda foolish for that one.

7. Golden State - Harrison Barnes (forward from UNC) - So... I know the last thing that the Warriors needed was another guy who can shoot all f**king day... but I REALLY like this pick. Barnes was supposed to be the #1 overall pick coming straight outta high school... then after some ACC competition for two years, his stock slipped a bit because they found out he wasn't LeBron... but he was still a really good player... like JJ Redick a few years back... but with a 38 inch vertical... so yeah, good things probably coming for the Warriors... plus he should have a chip on his shoulder since Cleveland didn't draft him. God knows I would. Seriously, Dion Waiters? Anyway, they also drafted a decent center from Vanderbilt named Festus Ezeli (just fun to say) and what I'm putting down as my potential steal of the draft... Draymond Green from Michigan State. Yeah, I know his college career crashed with blowing out his knee... but he's young... and the NBA has great doctors... and he's already got the knowledge & skills, not one of these f**king potential picks that I kind of despise & rarely work out. Anyway, with their trades last year & a potential offseason under coach Mark Jackson, watch out for the Warriors in 2012-2013. They may surprise you... sigh... but that'll mean that ticket prices are gonna be sh*tty... compounded with them moving to San Francisco in 2017 allegedly. Oh, did I mention that? Cuz that's kind of exciting in it's own right.

8. Toronto - Terence Ross (Washington) - Okay, I'm not gonna lie, I don't have an opinion one way or another about Ross because all I've heard or seen is that I've heard he can jump... the reason I'm bringing up the Raptors at all (besides the coolest mascot name in sports) is their second round pickup of Baylor's Quincy Acy. I really like this guy. Always have since he was a freshman. He's a little undersized for power forward... but strong, resilient, & can jump outta the building. All he seems to do is grab offensive boards and dunk them back in. What's not to love about that? Great weak side shot blocker too. Should really work well coming off the bench for a little punch with the Raptors international coalition that they have going up there. I'll say it... he reminds me of Charles Barkley without the nastiness... which really makes him like a Reggie Evans or Lavoy Allen kind of journeyman. Still, I like it.

9. Detroit - Andre Drummond (center from UConn) - Everybody picks this guy apart. EVERYBODY!!! They like to focus on what he isn't... which apparently is a free throw shooter (29%? Really? I hit more with my eye closed, no joke, I'd check his f**king vision, they ain't got optomistrists in Storrs?), but I'm gonna tell you what he is. He's big (7 feet, 280 pounds) and 19 years old... so may still be growing a bit. He's athletic. They keep saying that he's immature & doesn't really know how to play the game at a high level or something... so I'll say it again. OF COURSE HE'S IMMATURE!!! HE'S 19 F**KING YEARS OLD!!! TEACH THE GIANT TO PLAY!!! Do you have any idea what kind of stupid immature sh*t I was doing when I was 19? I'll give you a hint... I'm not gonna talk about it on this blog. Anyway, I kinda love this pic. He could be a big deal in Detroit for a long time to come if he wants to focus on his game.

12. Houston - Jeremy Lamb (guard from UConn) - Okay three of the next seven picks were by the Rockets who were really just trying to get a bunch of people to trade for Dwight Howard (or really anybody else they could get for the pile of average players on their roster) before that came crashing down... so now they... they just... well, do you remember when Kevin Garnett got traded to the Celtics... and the Timberwolves had like 18-20 players rights... but they could only have 15, so they ended up just dumping a lot of them... and then sucking so hard it ripped the space time continuum up North for a while? I don't think it's a coincidence that Kevin McHale is involved in both of these situation... but with this potential suckhole being placed in Houston, this might threaten the entire United State from getting sucked into this vortex. That might be harsh... and I may be way off... but we'll see. They have a lot of decent assets. Let's see if they know how to handle them.

21. Boston - Jared Sullinger (forward from Ohio State) - This guy might be my other pick for steal of the draft if he lives up to half his potential. Another player that was thought to be a potential #1 overall two years ago... but had a decent college career without giving too much effort (one of his knocks) and had some back injuries that may halt his career at any time... but for a late first round pick, I like him in Boston. Give them size & toughness and a little scoring punch in the post. The next pick was Fab Melo from Syracuse and... what is it about Syracuse players being overrated? I get it, you play in Madision Square Garden all the time... but if you're a seven footer... and you AVERAGE 7 points & 5 boards a game, HOW ARE YOU A FIRST ROUND DRAFT PICK??? Oh Big East Defensive player of the year? Who was your competition for that? Anyway... I hate to say it... but Fab Melo reminds me of a skinnier version of Daniel Orton a few years back. Oh who's Daniel Orton? Remember when the Magic drafted him to be Dwight's protege two years ago? 19 year old that average 3 points & 3 boards at Kentucky? Yeah, not sure what he's up to now... but that pretty much says it.

28. Oklahoma City - Perry Jones III (forward from Baylor) - He should actually feel a little blessed that he fell to a team like OKC that could maximize his talents. PJ3 as the kids are calling him had some knee issues & seemingly motivational issues his last year at Baylor... but trainers & millions of dollars as well as a great basketball environment in OKC could turn this slide around and make him a great contributor on this young team that's already established but needed height & skills. They got both with PJ3 if they can keep him healthy.

The Spurs had like the 2nd to last pick of the draft... and it was some guy I never heard of... so yeah, about the only other late pick that I had an opinion about was Minnesota picking up Robbie Hummel from Purdue who should help them out... again, if he can stay healthy (had a few major injuries that brought down the Purdue program during a title run) but yeah, that's about it this round. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready for my mom's visit. Have a great 4th of July weekend everybody!!!

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