Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Not Taco Bell Material

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
Well… unfortunately Jackie D will not be joining the awesomeness this Thanksgiving weekend. She has had some last minute issues come up with work (yes, work) and was not able to make a triumphant return to the Bay Area… but I’m sure that we’ll beat the beat up some other time. We miss you here on the best coast. Hopefully you’ll have a little bit of fun wherever you spend Turkey Day. Anyway, enough about her… this is MY blog. Let’s see…
Saturday was spent with Dizzy, and we had some breakfast pizza at CafĂ© Avellino (seriously, check out their breakfast pizza, it’s pretty good) and pretty much relaxed during the day, watched a little TV, she did a little homework, etc. Then as the sun set around 4 PM (really?), we headed out to North Beach for some dinner at Burgermeister followed by a live podcast of Adam Carolla from “The Man Show” & “Loveline” fame. I feel as though I should tell you ahead of time… that Dizzy really likes Adam Carolla… like, more than a friend. Obsessed? That may be a little much… but she really likes the guy. I do too… but I have a penis & the mentality that’ll make me a GREAT old man someday, so it makes sense. Here are some things that you may not know about the Aceman that I’m going to share with you:
  • His nickname is “Ace” or “The Aceman”. Did he give it to himself? Who cares? It works… and it’s also the name of his entertainment company.
  • His middle name is Lakers. Like… legally. There’s a funny story behind it… but I’m not going to bore you with it. Basically he was a smartass at the DMV one day & now it’s on all his legal documents. I hate the Lakers… but I have to admire the dedication. $teve Spurs Love? Not likely…
  • He wrote, produced & starred in a straight-to-DVD movie called “The Hammer” which I highly recommend
  • He’s also written a few books (which I’ve also read, I know, shocking, I’m literate) entitled “In Fifty Years, We’ll All Be Chicks” & “Not Taco Bell Material” that are basically a collection of rants & interesting points of view, not unlike this blog
  • He has his own booze (ala Jay-Z) called Mangria, which is basically a combination of vodka, red wine & a splash of juice. I’ve made my own mixture & it’s potent as hell… but his mass produced version is 12.5% alcohol. Still not horrible though… and effective
  • He’s basically a great handyman, cook & laborer by trade… who just also happens to be a comedian / philosopher / conglomerate & is the host of one of the biggest podcasts in the world. Congrats playa!
Anyway, because I’m the greatest gentleman friend ever, Dizzy & I sat front row center… basically at stool & taint level with Mr. Carolla & his guests Allison Rosen and Peter Wolf. Oh yes… I’m that guy… putting all other guys to shame. The show was good, lots of laughs, and of course… met up with Ace after the show…

Last week I watched “The Raven” starring John Cusack as the great American writer Edgar Allen Poe… or at least a variation of him, but he pulled it off well. There is a MURDERER in Baltimore… a serial killer if you will… and he or she (I’m an equal opportunity detective… like Batman) is killing them in manners similar to the writings of Mr. Poe. Of course, Edgar, like most artists, is basically a broke addict who can’t seem to get any recognition for his great works until he’s dead… but alas his expertise is requested by the local magistrate to help find this killer. Then it gets personal as the killer is leaving devious, cunning messages (I guess) and then (spoiler) kidnaps his girlfriend (Alice Eve). The movie wasn’t too bad. I enjoyed it. Some parts were a little cheesy & other a little unnecessary… and a few times, Batgirl & I were really confused because… maybe there was a deleted scene that had important information as to why something was? Still… give it a shot if you like “From Hell” or “Sherlock Holmes” because it’s kind of in that same vein.

Thursday night, I finally watched the long awaited prequel to the Alien quadrilogy “Prometheus” starring Noomi Rapace, Charlize Theron, Michael Fassbender & Guy Pearce (as an incredibly old man in probably the most questionable yet awesome casting call ever). The story is set that archeologists in the 2090’s discover various cave drawings around the world that point towards celestial beings in a distant star system inviting us to their planet. After years in hypersleep travel, scientists, archeologists, robots, grunts & investors alike arrive at the destination hoping to meet these celestial beings & find answers to the existence of life, faith, blah blah blah… basically they really just want to see some badass aliens like the viewers do, am I right? Okay… so from their arrival… it gets really weird… and I’ll just leave you at that… and it’s pretty awesome. That being said… this too was a movie where… you just kinda don’t want to ask too many questions because… well, you know… it’s only going to frustrate you. It’s like “The Dark Knight Rises” where the more you really think about it… it’s just going to make your movie watching experience that much worse. Just enjoy the flick… and I think you’ll know the parts that I’m talking about when you watch it… but I’m not spoiling anything for you. WATCH IT NOW!!!
Anyway, that'll do it for this entry. Have a great Turkey Day everybody!!! May food & football & thankfulness fill your soul!!!

1 comment:

Izzy Gerbil Tamer said...

You really are the greatest Gentleman Friend EVER!!!

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