Friday, June 17, 2011

Slap It Up, Flip It, Rub It Down






Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, the roommate interviews went splendidly. We were slated for five on Wednesday, two actually showed up, both took about five minutes each tops, both were pretty easy-going chicks from what I could tell (not even time for nicknames really), and within a few hours of the interview… one of them started signing checks… and she’ll be moving in on Tuesday. How sweet is that? Now let’s just hope she’s not a secret creeper. I’m sure she’s fine though. I’ll let you know her nom de plume just as soon as I get one for her. Other than that, just been a busy week with work & a little working out, but still not as much as I should be. I could blame interviews… but it’s just me mostly, especially when the sun’s going down & I’ve been up since early. Oh well, the weekend should reinvigorate my sense of wonder. Sunday night… TECH N9NE!!! Stay tuned…

Earlier this week, I watched “The Next Three Days” starring Russell Crowe, Liam Neeson & Elizabeth Banks (and an eclectic ensemble cast that included Olivia Wilde, Brian Dennehy, the RZA & Daniel Stern among others). Okay, the story is about an apparently brilliant man (Crowe) whose wife (Banks, who is probably too pretty to ever really be considered a great actress, just saying) is arrested & convicted for murdering a coworker. The man spends his fortune trying to defend her, retrial, almost to the Supreme Court… to no avail. The evidence is staggering… but he believes she didn’t do it. So now… he’s convinced that he’s going to break her out of jail… and they’re going to run away to some far off country. He even asks an expert criminal (Neeson in a two minute scene) to find out how to do it & not get caught. Oh… and there’s a 9-year old son involved too. The premise may be a little on the edge of reason… but the movie itself is actually pretty good. It’s even fairly realistic… whereas the odds are REALLY stacked against you in trying to break somebody out of jail… and have enough money to get away & stay away undetected… and trusting people in an untrustworthy industry like forfeiting, robbing, stealing & prison. Go figure. So yeah… it’s pretty good. I would recommend it… but it’s going to take a little disbelief in a few spots.

A few days ago, I sat and watched a movie with Nurse again… and this time, it was “Easy A” starring Emma Stone, Amanda Bynes, Stanley Tucci, Thomas Haden Church & Lisa Kudrow. They say it’s a modern retelling of “The Scarlet Letter” but… it’s really just about rumors spreading like wildfire through high school and teenage drama mostly. There’s this girl that (inexplicably) nobody notices (Stone) who makes a little white lie to cover spending an entire weekend singing “Pocket Full of Sunshine” by saying that she went on a date… and her ditzy friend starts saying that she’s been banging this imaginary guy… and it goes from there. She starts being ridiculed by the stuck-up church girl (Bynes), and seeks advise from her favorite teacher (Church) but the lies just kind of go from there because she likes that people actually notice her… even if it’s because they think she’s a tramp. That being said though… it was actually pretty damn funny. I almost feel bad saying it given my usual stance on chick flicks AND teenage drama… but yeah, it was actually pretty funny on many levels… and I might even watch it again.

Later that night… it was time for “The Green Hornet” starring Seth Rogen & Christophe Waltz. Now, this movie has been gestating for a looooong time with Kevin Smith in & out as the writer / director… but that apparently wasn’t meant to be. Regardless, I really liked this movie… but obviously more for the comedy of Seth Rogen & the writers who brought you half of the good comedies since “40 Year Old Virgin” than the superhero storyline. Anyway, the story is about a young man (Rogen) who inherits a newspaper fortune… and basically, while drunk one night with his chauffeur / mechanic / barista Kato, they decide to become crime fighters… but by disguising themselves as criminals. Why? Because superheroes get their asses kicked. So with the help of his own newspaper giving this new mysterious “bad guy” press, the baddest guy in all of LA (Waltz) decides that he’s had enough of competition… and conspires to eliminate this Green Hornet... who honestly is causing more destruction than he's preventing... but hey, that's not for me to say. Okay, I’d recommend watching this movie… but basically only because it’s pretty hilarious… and some of the special effects are okay (not all). The director Michel Gondry is the guy who did “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” & “Science of Sleep” so it has it moments where you question it… but since it’s a big budget blockbuster they had plenty of guys making sure it made sense & if you’re a fan of Rogen’s dialogue… then you’ll like this movie. There’s even a cameo from James Franco, ladies. There. Now go see it. Here’s the news…

Children’s Book Update – As you know, I’ve been interested in the idea of making children’s books for some time… but have no artistic ability so the illustrations would be crudely drawn creatures (probably with humongous breasts) and I’d probably work a few phrases into the story just to picture the parents reading them the first time. “Wait… did I just say reach around while talking about Santa’s elves helping one another? That can’t be right.” Regardless, it’s refreshing to see that being borderline crazy (human) won’t play too much of a role, because I’m just like everybody else in the industry. A New York children's author who used a curse word in exasperation during a plane delay at a U.S. airport was ejected from the aircraft for disruptive behavior. Robert Sayegh, 37, said Atlantic Southeast Airlines overreacted to his salty language when it summoned police aboard to escort him off the Sunday evening flight at Detroit Metro Airport (there’s a reason right there… he was in Detroit). "The f-word is not a nice word to use," he acknowledged in a telephone interview, adding he was complaining to himself rather than snapping at anyone in particular. "I really didn't think I was being that loud." Sayegh, who is also a television producer, was catching a connecting flight home after attending a relative's wedding in Kansas City, Missouri. He was, by his own account, feeling tired. The plane was not taking off. The explanation that there was a problem with the overhead compartments did little to soothe his irritation, he said. And so, to no one in particular, he wondered aloud, using coarse language, what was taking so long. "I said the f-word," Sayegh said. Perhaps, he recalled, he said it twice. A flight attendant seated near Sayegh took offense. Soon he was being led off the plane by police. "I didn't direct it at him," Sayegh said, referring to the flight attendant. "The only reason he heard me was he was sitting in his seat behind me." Atlantic Southeast Airlines said in a statement that it was investigating the incident aboard Flight 5136, and declined to offer further details. The airline confirmed that a passenger was removed and then booked onto another flight back to New York a couple of hours later. "We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused," the airline statement said. Typical response. Sayegh apologized for offending anyone with his language. "I asked the people around me if I was being rude and they said 'No.' If I was this loud disruptive passenger then I'm sure everyone would have been aware of it." Sayegh said he would complain to the airline. "The ironic part is I'm putting a children's book out in August so this wasn't the kind of press I was looking for," he added, saying there are no obscenities in the book. I’ll admit it. I’ve used the f-word more than thrice on a flight… and those are ones without delays. “I’m just saying the city that I’m going to in Thailand. What’s the big f**king deal?” “It’s pronounced pu-ket.” “Then why is it spelled Phuket???” Anyway, that’s a future discussion. He must have REALLY offended somebody on that flight… but hey, he’ll get compensated with a free flight or something… and a little publicity for his book.

Bank Robbing Update – I should seriously make a monthly magazine about bank robbing or something. I still think it would be an interesting idea… but the subscription membership would be… questionable at best. Probably big on the militia crowd. Anyway, a woman robbed a Colorado bank by passing a note saying she would infect a teller with AIDS if the clerk didn't hand over money, police said on Friday. Jeff Satur, spokesman for the Longmont, Colorado police department, said detectives are searching for a pale woman between the ages of 55 and 75 with a "boney build." Satur said a woman, who was wearing a train conductor's cap and a gray sweat shirt, walked into a Wells Fargo bank inside a Safeway grocery store on Thursday night and handed a note to a teller. "She indicated she had AIDS and would give it to a teller if she didn't cooperate," Satur said. The woman coughed frequently into a blue bandana during the robbery, and fled with an undisclosed amount of cash, Satur said. Police and the FBI released still photographs of the robbery and are reviewing additional photographs and surveillance video from the bank's parking lot to try and identify the suspect. She is described as about 5-feet 6 inches tall, and weighing between 130 and 150 pounds. No weapon was displayed during the robbery and no one was injured, police said. So to recap… a frail looking grandma type threatened the bank teller to give them a disease if they didn’t hand over the cash. I know banks are insured… but that’s kind of like threatening to exist. I’m not one for confrontation… but if an old lady threatens my life at my place of work, she is making a horrible life choice at that point, especially if there’s a blunt object anywhere within arm’s length & I don’t think she’s spry enough to defend herself. Okay, honestly I would’ve just given her the money too… but only because it was insured. If it were my pocket, first off, I could outrun her. Secondly, I could taze her if I didn’t want to worry about the blood splatter from my foot breaking off in her backside. Thirdly, she’s an old lady, she’s already ripe with disease. She’s probably robbing a bank just to pay for medication anyway (thank you corporate America). So my grade for this robbery – C+. Why? It worked for the moment… nobody got hurt… and the money probably went for a good cause. However, in the wrong set of circumstances, she could’ve been put down by just about anybody in the place who wanted to be a hero. Just saying…

Tarantino Update - Darren Aronofsky is reportedly in talks with Christian Bale about possibly starring in his $130 million take on "Noah's Ark" reports Vulture. The locking down of Bale would help secure studio backing for the project assuming Aronofsky wants Bale for the lead. At present a trio of studios (Paramount, Summit, and Fox) considering co-financing the movie with New Regency where it is set up. However, this isn’t a Bale Update… this is a Tarantino Update, so why do I even mention it. I thought it was interesting. A Noah’s Ark movie? Okay. Meanwhile Showbiz 411 reports that Jamie Foxx (“Ray”, “Miami Vice” & “Booty Call”) may be joining Quentin Tarantino‘s “Django Unchained” in the titular role. There is also a rumor that Leonardo DiCaprio is also "definitely signed" according to the report. For those who don’t know, this is Tarantino’s Western film that he’s been talking about for YEARS, more like decades. Oh… and for you naysayers thinking that Leonardo DiCaprio can’t do a Western… go check out “The Quick & the Dead” and get back to me. That was twenty years ago. He’s damn near an Eastwood by now. And Jamie Foxx can definitely be a black sheriff a la Blazing Saddles… or whatever part he may be. I’m excited. Too bad it’ll probably be another 2-3 years before we get to see the end product. Damn Tarantino for being a perfectionist!!! Oh well, it should be worth the wait.

That’ll do it for this evening. Got some shopping to do for birthdays & Father’s Day tomorrow and then TECH N9NE Sunday night with Bubbles. It should be fun… plus plenty of sunshine from what I’m told. Thursday, I leave for Utah for the weekend & Spitso’s wedding. Should make for a good time… as 4th of July is after that. Fun fun fun!!! Have a great weekend everybody!!!

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