Next Year... Next Year...

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

 

Last night, I had a little Team Outing that consisted of a few drinks at Local Edition, a speakeasy-style bar on Market Street… and it was pretty good. The drinks were decent for being the usual ten bucks a pop for what equates to about 4-5 ounces of liquid, maybe 2 ounces of it alcoholic in nature. It was very dark inside… had a old timey newspaper “on the low” kind of theme but very swanky… and the waitresses had large bosoms that they subtly flaunted so… yeah, not bad. I stayed there for a few hours chilling with the coworkers, some flying in from out of town (they usually work remotely) so it was good to catch up. Then I got some food at Del Taco & headed to a bar to watch the Spurs lose Game 7 of the NBA Finals to the Miami Heat. Sum’bich…

 

My beloved Spurs were so close just a few days ago… but that’s why you play the game. It took a miraculous comeback in Game 6 & then holding off the great teamwork of the Spurs in Game 7 (both at home by the way) but congratulations to the Miami Heat. You guys get hated on… a lot… and a little deserved at times… but yeah, not nearly as much as you’ve been getting. You have a great team there… and the Spurs have a great team… and it’s always good to see good teams playing for the championship. Kudos to both!!!

 

NBA 2K13 Update: I was wondering why everybody else got these regular game type numbers like 30 points a game & because I was only playing 5 minute quarters, my 12-13 wasn’t really holding weight. Well, I found where the simulated games can be adjusted to 5 minutes… and so with a fair slate, I won Rookie of the Month & am slowly but surely climbing the ranks of not only the rookies but the league (considering I still haven’t quite figured out the free throws & all of the controls). Also, the Bucks are on an eight-game winning streak right now after we had a rough patch. I think we’re #3 in the East right now. Brandon Jennings (ball hog) is an MVP candidate & I’ll be joining him shortly. I’ve even won about a half dozen Player of the Game awards now. Good times… and the game’s still kinda fun… though I’m kinda regretting going with the “All-Around SF” from the start… but hey, now I know better for the next go around. Here’s some real news…

 

Wanted: Jester – It’s not a joke. An Austrian hotel is advertising for a modern-day court fool, who is communicative, extroverted, musical, creative and imaginative. Applicants are asked to bring & play their musical instrument during the job interview. Also welcome: creative costumes. The successful candidate will earn 1,400 Euros (around $1,900) a month, which really isn’t bad for a struggling artist. Hotel director Melanie Franke says those interested should not think they're on a fool's errand in applying. She says the idea is to treat guests like royalty, noting that "jesters were a luxury that royal families indulged themselves in." The hotel in Austria's Styria province was designed by famed Austrian artist Friedensreich Hundertwasser and Fraulein Franke says the jester concept fits its hotel's colorful appearance. Fun fact about the article above & embedded… IT DOESN’T GIVE THE NAME OF THE F**KING HOTEL!!! Seriously, what the f**k is wrong with “journalists” nowadays? Sorry media… but you keep f**king up… I don’t want to call you on it… I HAVE TO!!! Anyway, sounds like a fairly sweet gig, right? Wear ridiculous outfits, act a fool, play a little lute, make ‘em laugh, using that German that you last used nearly 15 years ago, what’s not to like?

 

Bacon Update - A family had a close encounter with a bear while celebrating Father's Day during a camping trip in Wyoming, NBC-2 reports. The Kelly family had a relaxing Sunday morning breakfast, but apparently they didn't clean up as well as they initially thought. Two staff members of the camp came to warn the Kelly family that a bear was close by, and that's when 11-year-old Baden Kelly sprung into action. Baden began screaming in order to get the bear's attention. He was able to distract the bear long enough for most of his family to run into a nearby cabin. However, his little sister Moriah, perhaps due to the shock of the situation, didn't run. Via NBC-2: "I said, 'Run, Moriah,' and she didn't run, so I got to her and I started running with her, and that's when the bear started running after us," Baden said. "By the time it got to about 10 feet behind us, my brother [Logan] came running really fast out of his cabin and shouted very loudly." Baden told Fox13Now.com that he "was scared because of Mariah and she’s just little, she wouldn’t have been able to fight for herself. So I had to make a choice and do that.” Logan's hard-charging bravery and Baden's refusal to leave his sister's side led to a happy ending for the family. Mom Kamila Kelly told NBC-2 that Moriah gave all the credit to her two big brothers. "The moment I saw Moriah being brought up by the staff, it was just such a relief, and she jumped into my arms and said, 'Baden and Logan saved my life,'" she said. Dad Brandon Kelly expressed his pride in his two boys. "He is definitely a hero, both of our boys are heroes today," he told Fox13Now.com. And even though many people would rethink their camping hobby after a face-to-face encounter with a hungry bear, Baden's enthusiasm for camping didn't appear to be waning. "I love camping, I love the outdoors, it’s just the experience," he told Fox13Now.com. "It’s something that can make you stronger." Great job kids! Of course, if this story had turned just a smidgen, then we’d be talking about the genocide of bears in national parks… but whatever, it’s all how you spin it. You may be asking, “$teve, why was this a bacon update if you just talked about crazy redneck kids saving their sister?” Well, according to NBC-2, a bit of bacon grease was still on the campground grill… and that was what drew the attention of the bear to their camp. That’s why! Speaking of breakfast foods…

 

 

That’s Some Good Sh*t!!! - Coffee snobs can now take it to a whole new level. The world’s most expensive (and extremely rare) cup of java, made from beans extracted from the excrement of a small animal, is ready to reach a broader audience. Hold it… I’m gonna let you think about what you just read for a moment… that’s right… let it sink in… you now may have access to the world’s most expensive coffee… that has already been passed. The Kopi Luwak coffee originates on the Indonesian island of Sumatra and is famously "produced" by the Paradoxurus, a relative of three breeds of civet, a slinky mammal that looks like a cross between a cat and a mongoose. When the Paradoxurus eats coffee cherries, the beans leave the digestive system more or less intact. The beans are then gathered, cleaned and roasted. Why exactly, nobody’s quite sure. Think about the guy who originally had the idea. “Holy crap! I’m going to clean & roast that cat-weasal thing’s poop. That oughta wake me up in the morning!” Amazingly, a cup of Kopi Luwak typically costs about $90. Or you can pick up a pound of the beans for around $1,000. To get a cup typically requires an appointment with one of the small number of establishments that carry the exotic blend. Is it the unusual and labor-intensive process that drives up the price? Or is there something truly, well, unique about the taste of this coffee, which was once referenced in reverential terms on the The Oprah Winfrey Show? The coffee website Funnel Mill describes Kopi Luwak as a "coffee ... said to be like no other. It has a rich, heavy flavor with hints of caramel and chocolate. Other terms used to describe it are earthy, aromatic, sweet and exotic. The body is almost syrupy and it is probably the smoothest coffee known to mankind.” Again, they’re describing coffee that comes from the feces of an Asian marmot. Now, the website Touch of Modern is offering a limited run of Kopi Luwak that, while not exactly cheap, won't break the bank: You can pick up a bag of Kopi Luwak Arabica for less than $30. Buying three 150-gram packages of it will set you back about $600. So, what do you think? Would you spend $600, or even $30, to try the world’s most rare and expensive coffee? Now’s your chance… but do it quickly… because…

 

Apocalypse Update – We now go to the murky depths of… Pennsylvania… for the next story.  Philadelphian Joe Malseed saw a 18-inch alligator last week in the city's Fishtown neighborhood and snapped its photo before calling for help (of course). He says the alligator was in a puddle and appeared to be emerging from a nearby sewer. So then he called animal control authorities to… offer the gator aid. Hahaha, yes… it’s a horrible pun… but it had to be made. Joe says the young gator was docile until a man tried to get a closer look and it hissed. Police took the reptile to the city's Animal Care & Control Team. The reptile has been named Allie-Gator (see? Now my Gatorade joke ain’t so bad). The animal control team said Wednesday despite the name it hasn't determined the alligator's gender because, "Who's going to do that job?" My guess: Somebody with BALLS!!! Where’s Mike Rowe when you need him? Anyway, Allie-Gator will remain with the team until a permanent home is found… since there’s not enough of her for a decent belt or shoes or anything. Why is this a sign of the coming Apocalypse? Because there was a f**king gator not only north of the Mason-Dixon Line (read a history book or the latest Rocky movie) but that it was walking the streets of Philly. Imagine when the full grown ones start rising from the sewers. BEWARE FELLOW EAGLES FANS!!!

 

Anyway, that’ll do it for tonight. Going to a luau party to celebrate the solstice… and one of Dizzy’s friend’s birthdays… so that should be a lot of fun. Have a great weekend everybody!!!

DAMN YOU, JESUS SHUTTLESWORTH!!!

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

 

So do you think I did okay with the birthday surprise on the last entry? Dizzy thinks so… I’m humble in my awesomeness but I think that I did pretty good… and the comments have been good on the Facebook. Maybe I am pretty good at this dating thing… or at least the presents part. Aside from that, Father’s Day was pretty cool. I talked with my stepdad for a few minutes and wished him a happy father’s day. He’s a good dude & I feel like he doesn’t get the respect that he should most of the time. He’s soft-spoken and… let’s face it, easily mockable most of the time… but he’s a great guy, very nice & most importantly makes my mom happy. When he married into the family, he basically went from a kind of snooty, arrogant “upper class” family into a gaggle of rednecks… and I know it wasn’t easy. Hell, I was the good one & I gave him plenty of grief… but I was a teenager, what do you expect? My brother though has never been a treat to anybody… and even his own son has ended up siding more with the other side of the family & staying away from him… which is unfortunately because he really loves that red-headed stepbrother of mine (as he should). So with that, thanks for putting up with all of us, Lavar! You’re a good sh*t…

 

As for my dad, he’s been recovering from his torn MCL & ACL since Easter when it happened, but he’s back at work with crutches. I got him some books as a present, one is an encyclopedia about Harley-Davidson motorcycles… and the other was a nice little one I found on Amazon about a man who basically went through his dad’s journal about a great road trip across America just before WWII on his Harley… called “The Old Man & the Harley” or something like that. He said that he has it next to his seat at the house so he can read it… and that’s cool. He & I are a lot a like… and apparently that means difficult to shop for. Anything that we particularly need or even want, we’ll basically take care of it or build it ourselves… so usually we get things like gift certificates, movies that came out for the holidays that we may or may not already have, sports memorabilia, stuff like that. Sure it can be frustrating for those trying to get gifts… but honestly, as long as we get a quick phone call or letter or something that just says “Hey, happy birthday” or whatever, we’re pretty good with that. Cash works too. Anyway, I gave him a call last weekend because… well, I thought it was Father’s Day… but also this last weekend when it was… and he’s in high spirits & I can’t wait to see both of them in about a month. Happy Father’s (or Not-A-Father’s) Day EVERYBODY!!!

 

So for the past week or so, I’ve been playing a new video game “NBA 2K13” and yes, I’m about a year behind everybody else in the world when it comes to video games because… unless it’s “Assassin’s Creed 5” or about every third “Madden” title, then I can wait a few months until it drops from $60+ to $20. Basically, this is game may have been made specifically for me just from an introductory perspective… it’s a basketball game… produced by Jay-Z… has past greats involved… and has a number of different play modes including a mode called My Career where you basically make a character & take them through their career. From rookie camps to draft day to riding the bench to making your way to starter to endorsement deals to answering media questions to free agency to All Star games to playoffs & championship to maybe even the Hall of Fame. Pretty cool, right? Well, like I said, I’m a week into it… and it’s my first time playing a 2K game (usually an EA Sports guy) and there’s a bit of a learning curve… but I’m liking it thus far, even if it’s frustrating at some points. Seriously guys, I’m not going to miss wide open layups just so you can keep me under 20 points a game off the bench… and the whole free throw system seems really off to me… still have no idea where & when I’m supposed to release it because the realistic way always seem wrong… but I get it. Gotta walk before you ball. The soundtrack is bangin’… the play for the most part is pretty smooth though there are a few things that irritate me… like how I suddenly turn ghost from time to time & people can pass right through me on defense… and again, the layups that just won’t go in (for that matter they won’t let a 6’9” small forward with a dunk rating in the mid 60’s dunk either, WTF?). I’ll keep you posted but I really like the game thus far.

 

Current Status: After an average showing at the Rookie Showcase, Steve Love was drafted #14 by the Milwaukee Bucks (though real life #14 pick John Henson is also on the team). After producing decent numbers on 5-6 minutes of the bench for the first ten games or so. I’ve moved into the starting lineup… so I get about 15 minutes a game (5 minute quarters) and… basically the hardest part for me getting points… is getting the ball away from Brandon Jennings & Monta Ellis, the two ballhog guards… but Ellis is injured now so… yay, I’ve stepped into the two-guard spot where I can drain threes a few times before they play tough on me. Starting to get a feel for the defensive controls & post moves too & always dishing out dimes so it’s going pretty good. About 18 games into the season, we’re 11-7 but 6-1 since I was in the lineup (tough loss to the Spurs, who “magically” went on 12-0 runs whenever I was out of the game) and even though my stats aren’t AMAZING due to a sub-40% free throw and/or layups being very iffy, I’m doing pretty decent. Here’s a shot of my billboard & magazine cover…

 

 

Speaking of basketball, I decided to watch my first full game of the year… since it was Game 6 of the NBA Finals and my San Antonio Spurs (fan since David Robinson’s rookie year) were ready to wrap up their 5^th title against the Miami Heat. So I went down to Café Prague to watch the game & Dizzy met up with me at halftime. Tim Duncan OWNED the first half, posting a career high with 25 first half points… but the Spurs were up by only six. They extended that lead to 10 at the start of the 4^th… and then apparently LeBron James removed his headband… not unlike Clark Kent removing his glasses… and he brought them back to a good close game… a few no calls that would’ve been for the Spurs but hey, that’s how it’s played in the playoffs… then for some reason they decide to leave wide open in the corner, not a great three-point shooter… but THE GREATEST THREE-POINT SHOOTER IN NBA HISTORY, JESUS SHUTTLESWORTH HIMSELF… RAY ALLEN!!! So… of course he made the tying shot… hard fought overtime… and now there will be a Game 7 tomorrow night. The only catch… I have a work outing tomorrow night in honor of my new Boss Man. All I have to say is… if they don’t have a TV with the game on… then I’ll be excusing myself to go to the bathroom A LOT during the night. “Excuse me, nature calls… at the bar across the street… I’ll be back in… 35, 45 minutes. Oh… and I’m taking this beverage with me.” Anyway, first world problems… here’s the news…

 

Whining About Wine - Award-winning chef Charlie Trotter is being sued by two New York wine collectors who say he sold them a bottle of wine for more than $46,000 that wasn't what it said on the label. (GASP!!!) The federal lawsuit filed Thursday in Chicago accuses Trotter and one of his wine experts of duping them into buying what they thought was a magnum of 1945 Romanee-Conti from the Domaine de la Romanee-Conti winery in June 2012. The collectors, Bekim and Ilir Frrokaj (Beh-KEEM' and ih-LEER' FRO'-kuh), say an appraisal firm concluded the bottle was counterfeit. They are seeking damages of more than $76,000 (emotional distress I’m sure). They accuse Trotter and his company of violating Illinois consumer fraud laws. An attorney for Trotter, John Riccione, did not immediately respond to a message seeking comment on Friday. Here’s the thing… you’re buying a bottle of rotten grape juice. I mean… think about it. I’m a huge fan of wine, don’t get me started… and having a winery down the road would basically be a dream come true… but why would anyone spend $46,000 on a bottle of wine as opposed to… I don’t know, a luxury sedan? Does this sh*t cure cancer? No, wait… they’d add a few zeroes if that was the case… but still, it’s f**king grape juice. You got conned! Probably after Chuck Trotter got conned! After somebody else conned a fellow hustler & so on & so forth. Drink Mangria!

 

Birthday Suit – Speaking of ridiculous lawsuits, a production company making a documentary about the song "Happy Birthday to You" is challenging the copyright to the famous jingle. Good Morning To You Productions Corp., which is working on a film tentatively titled "Happy Birthday," argues in a lawsuit filed Thursday that the song should be "dedicated to public use and in the public domain." The company is seeking monetary damages and restitution of more than $5 million in licensing fees collected by Warner/Chappell Music Inc. from thousands of people and groups who've paid it licensing fees. "More than 120 years after the melody to which the simple lyrics of Happy Birthday to You is set was first published, defendant Warner/Chappell boldly, but wrongfully and unlawfully, insists that it owns the copyright to Happy Birthday to You," the lawsuit states. Warner/Chappell, based in Los Angeles, claims exclusive copyright to "Happy Birthday to You," which Guinness World Records has called the most famous song in the English language. The company, whose artists include Aretha Franklin, Barry Gibb, Rob Zombie, Madonna and Michael Jackson, didn't immediately respond to a request for comment Thursday. Good Morning To You Productions argues that evidence dating to 1893 helps show the song's copyright expired around 1921. It says four previous copyrights to the melody of the similar-sounding song "Good Morning to All," filed in 1893, 1896, 1899 and 1907, have expired or been forfeited. The class action lawsuit says that Warner/Chappell claims the exclusive copyright to the song based on piano arrangements published in 1935 but that the copyright applies only to the piano arraignment and not to the melody or lyrics. LAWYERED!!! The film company filed the lawsuit after having to pay Warner/Chappell a $1,500 licensing fee and sign an agreement to use the song in a scene — or face a $150,000 penalty. What does it mean? Some lawyers are gonna get paid… and you can keep singing happy birthday dozens of times a year without looking over your shoulder for Big Brother… at least for a few more weeks. All I gotta say is… Cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake…

 
 
 

Diary of Not-Anne Frank - U.S. officials on Thursday unveiled the 400-page diary of Alfred Rosenberg, a top aide to Adolf Hitler, who oversaw the genocide against Jews and others during World War Two. The diary disappeared after the Nuremberg trials in 1946, sparking a nearly 70-year hunt that ended on April 5^th in the upstate New York town of Lewiston, at the home of an academic named Herbert Richardson. The diary pages, hand-written in German and not yet completely translated into English by scholars, offers a broader look at the Third Reich's policies and practices, as well as an unvarnished account of a Nazi leader's thoughts, authorities said at a news conference on Thursday. "These 400 pages are a window into the dark soul of one of the great wrongs in human history," said John Morton, director of U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement, which investigates cases of missing cultural property. "It's significant because, as time marches on, there are fewer living witnesses of what happened during the Holocaust. We still don't know the full extent." Pages of the diary, which will eventually be turned over to the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington, D.C., were shown to reporters, including one entry dated April 1941. Rosenberg describes walking alone after "an important meeting" with Hitler, who told him: "Your great hour has come." Museum senior adviser Henry Mayer, who had been searching for the diary for 17 years, noted Rosenberg did not elaborate in the entry. "What Hitler described was so great, he couldn't put it down," Mayer told reporters. U.S. officials have long suspected that a prosecutor, Robert Kempner, smuggled the diary back to the United States after the Nuremberg trial. Born in Germany, Kempner fled to America in the 1930s to escape the Nazis, only to return for post-war trials. He is credited with helping reveal the existence of the Wannsee Protocol, the 1942 conference during which Nazi officials met to coordinate the extermination of the Jews, which they termed "The Final Solution." Kempner cited a few Rosenberg diary excerpts in his memoir and in 1956 a German historian published entries from 1939 and 1940. But the bulk of the diary never surfaced. After his death in 1993, heirs to his estate agreed to forfeit his possessions to the U.S. holocaust museum, but that agreement hit road blocks and the diary was never found. However in 1999, when cleaning out Kempner's home in suburban Philadelphia, a man found 40 boxes of documents, including papers outlining the Nazi's "aggressive war against and the plundering, spoliation and the economic exploitation of the Soviet Union by the Nazi regime," according to a 2003 court filing. But the diary was not among the materials. "That was what we were looking for, that's what was so frustrating," said Robert Wittman, the founder of the FBI's Art Crime Team, and now a private art security consultant. In recent months, Wittman and his son, Jeffrey, helped ICE locate the diary in New York. The diary offers Rosenberg's recollections from the spring of 1936 to the winter of 1944, according to an analysis by the Holocaust museum. Most entries are written in Rosenberg's looping cursive, some on paper torn from a ledger book and others on the back of official Nazi stationery, according to a U.S. government analysis obtained by Reuters. "Although it is a reminder of a dark time, the Rosenberg Diary is important to our understanding of history," said U.S. Attorney Charles M. Oberly. "Our hope is that it will provide valuable insight to historians." Why do I mention this? It’s history. First hand accounts of what transpired during this horrible time of history… and maybe some insight into how such a tragic thing came to be. I’m pretty intrigued by what the content of those pages may be… but it also seems like it might be a big buildup to a disappointing book based on the descriptions that the guy is giving… so we shall see. I’m guessing that it’s not going to sell quite as well as Anne Frank’s Diary though. Just a hunch…

 

Anyway, that should do it for tonight. Gotta make some tough decisions about tomorrow night… do the work thing… or watch Game 7… hopefully it’ll work out so I can just do both… and the Spurs win the championship ring for the thumb… and maybe Tim Duncan retires… or maybe he stays for a few more trips. Who knows? That’s why we all play the game I guess… have a great game everybody!!!

Secret Santa Rosa Weekend

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

First & foremost, happy fathers day (or not-a-father's day) to all the potential fathers out there!!!

Well, it happened... the super secret birthday weekend (day really) for Dizzy... and we woke up bright & early (6:15-ish), packed up a bag of road trip goodies, and went all the way to... Santa Rosa (a little over an hour away). It may not have been too far... but the first stop was into the rolling hills of wine country to see the beasts of Africa at Safari West!!! Now, for those of you who don't know... Dizzy loves goats... and giraffes... because they're basically SUPER GOATS!!! And there were plenty at Safari West where you can get pretty close & personal... but I'm getting ahead of myself. Here are some pictures from the three-hour safari tour...

 

Ostriches picking a lock...

 

Quite possibly the happiest girl on Earth at this moment...

 

This... is actually pretty cool...

Next, we grabbed some In-N-Out Burger for sustenance, and went to the Charles M. Schulz Museum. You may know him as the creator of the Peanuts gang... and you'd be right, but those who really knew him apparently called him Sparky... and he loved hockey, the city of Santa Rosa & just being able to express himself through his comic strips & helping others. The museum was pretty decent... and reasonably priced... and with Dizzy & I being aspiring comic book makers, it made sense. Enjoy these photos...

 

Giant mural may not seem like much...

 

Until you realize it's about 3500 of these...

 

Nursery wall for Sparky's daughter...

His office... and what's that under his desk?

Basketball signed by Dr. Julius Erving

After the museum, we went back to my place for a quick nap (late night + early start) before heading to a fundraiser from the creators of the Carla & Larry Show that was raising money for a lovely young woman named Susan who is part of Bike Zambia, who bike around Zambia spreading AIDS awareness & working with several different organizations. Basically it was reasonable priced great food, free Caymus wines, raffle ticket prizes & socializing with some of San Francisco's elite... so we had a great time, full bellies & I even won a pack of CDs. Thanks for the invite, Carla! And enjoy Zambia, Susan!!!

That's pretty much it for the weekend... on that note, we also watched a movie but I'll wait until another entry to chat about it. Hope you all had a great weekend as well & again, HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!