Bottling Easter

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

 

Friday night, Izzy & I watched “Space Cowboys” starring Clint Eastwood, James Garner, Tommy Lee Jones & Donald Sutherland in this pseudo-comedy about four geriatric former Air Force astronaut candidates from the 50’s who missed out on the Apollo missions because their… I don’t know… boss? Commanding officer? It’s kinda vague exactly what kind of influence he (James Cromwell) really had over them… but they sent a chimp into space instead of these four. Now, forty years later (made in 1999) there’s an aging Russian satellite that’s malfunctioning… and the only person that can fix it is the creator of the antique guidance system that’s on it (Eastwood). However, he wants to go to space… and take his buddies along with him… and basically just stick it to the guy in charge of NASA (still Cromwell somehow, forty years later). So the outlaw Josey Wales gets the band back together with an elderly “Casanova” (Sutherland), Rockford-turned-preacher (Garner) and… well… widower crop duster Tommy Lee Jones playing Tommy Lee Jones as only Tommy Lee Jones can play. It’s a pretty good little flick… kinda BS at some points… but really what do you expect with the premise? Overall, I’d say check it out… maybe with your parents… you know, make ‘em feel like they could be astronauts still… cuz chances are they’d thought about it a few times as a kid.

 

There were just two things about this movie that kinda bothered me. First off, the flight controller was apparently having some kind of f**king issue with his prosthetic teeth (caps) because they’re basically sticking out the entire time & I know he’s supposed to be chewing on gum constantly… but it looks like when you put peanut butter in a horse’s mouth the entire time. It was off-putting… but still, kudos to him for still acting through it. Secondly, spoiler alert… so turn away if you must, I have a minor issue with the ending. Okay... again, spoiler alert, to start the 3^rd act, Tommy Lee Jones’ character Hawk is diagnosed with inoperable cancer… so he’s going to die soon… gee, I wonder who’s going to have to sacrifice himself when they’re in space. That’s not the issue… I liked that. My issue is that… he sacrifices himself to save the others… and just before the credits roll, there’s a scene set to Sinatra’s “Fly Me To The Moon” where you see… basically Tommy Lee Jones’ astronaut suit sat up against a moon rock and enjoying the view of Earth as if he were in a lounge chair during his last few moments… not a bad way to go out, right? Except for one little thing… forgiving that I assume for TLJ to make it to the lunar surface, there was probably some kind of re-entry collision with the ground… if this is truly his final resting place… then basically what you’re seeing is the suit containing the corpse of a man who died GASPING for air in the infinity of space, alone… and I’m not going to lie… instead of watching the reflections off his gold-plated astronaut visor, I kinda wanted the visor to flip open at the last minute revealing the frozen, contorted face not unlike somebody beholding the Ark of the Covenant. Yes, it’s a horrible & image to imagine… but hey, that’s just me… play ‘em out, Frankie! Roll credits…

 

Saturday, Izzy & I helped out for her class’ final reading of their literary works at the SAFEhouse for the Arts. Izzy read a short story about her recent BS with the electric company (where basically because used less electricity than most first world citizens do, she was penalized & charged about five times as much in penalties) but it was very well written & even pleasantly humorous. She & about a dozen other gifted artists shared their poems & short stories… and a good time was had by all. I know what you’re thinking… and no, I didn’t read. I manned the bar. Somebody has to get that money to help fund the arts. Good times…

 

Sunday was Easter… and I’ll be honest, it was the first holiday where not having my dad around since his passing kinda hit me a little bit. Basically I awoke Sunday morning to my mom calling from Utah (an hour ahead & I was sleeping in) and saying “Happy Easter” and playing this ridiculous little blue plush bunny that says “Meeeeeh somebunny loves youuuuu… ntntntntntntntt (bunny chomping)” and then my niece & nephew joined in. Along with having my lovely ladyfriend by my side … Really a good way to be woken up if I say so myself… and also it was raining… which I also enjoy immensely. After chatting it up with them briefly, my first thought upon hanging up was “I should call my dad and wish him a hap…” and then it kinda hit me… just enough… and it probably didn’t help that basically what I was looking at while laying back in my bed was his mini-urn hanging over my closet. It also probably didn’t help that my dad looked a lot like Jesus most of the time growing up… long hair, beard, basically picture White Jesus with Aviator sunglasses… and the alleged point of Easter is that He arose three days after being killed to seek revenge on his conspirators… or something like that, I think the story kinda tapers off after he comes back… like people went “Holy sh*t! He’s alive! He’s reborn!” Then Jesus kinda wanders off while they’re busy telling their friends or something? I don’t recall a big meeting where He says anything about His return or any deeds that He di… NO! NO NO NO! I’m not getting off track with another “What the f**k is Easter exactly?” rant… back to the point. Anyway, so the thought of the three days… turned to three weeks… and then the three months that it was been (how zombie trilogies go, right?) and it was kinda like… “Yeah… he’s not coming back… and I miss him.” Did I know this before? Absolutely! Hell, my stepmom had him cremated & a party in his honor within three days… and we’re not on speaking terms. Not that I’m bitter or anything, it’s just any time that my brother or I try to figure out what’s going on with “the estate” there’s no contact back… so I assume it’s either being given away to family members that aren’t us… or being wholesaled to try & finance the massive debt that was probably kept from us. Alas… that was my moment… and then I squoze my ladyfriend & we began our busy brew day… cuz what can you do other than move along happily with your life? On that note, here are some pictures from our walks...

 

The day started with a special new brew for us known as a SMaSH recipe. SMaSH stands for Single Malt and Single Hop… so basically the recipe is fairly simple, usuing only one grain to extract the sugars from… and then one hop variety during the boil and/or fermentation. Though the recipe is simple, it’s also a great way to experiment, toy with, and accentuate or find out what flavor qualities come from the malt & hop being used. For this first time, we thought that it’d be interesting to try to do an English Pale Ale using Maris Otter grain, which typically has a bready/biscuit flavor… and UK Kent Golding hops, which compliment it well & are often used in English Ales of all sorts. Though the malt will typically be pretty one-note, you can toy around with the hop additions during the boil to empathize different levels of bitterness and aroma… all from the same hop variety. Anyway, here are some pictures of the process…

 

 

Another big thing that happened… was that Izzy & I FINALLY bottled our Barrel-Aged Imperial Stout that we started back in October & has been fermenting away in our five-gallon whiskey barrel from Seven Stills for a little over two months now. Remember, the ABV was about 11% BEFORE we put it in the whiskey barrel… and let me tell you, all it really did was add even more complexity to the flavors… and basically mellow out the alcohol burn you normally get in the mouthfeel with a beer this big… but it’s also probably around 13-15% ABV now… so yeah, VERY delicious & boozy… and it shall be called… $teve’s Birthday Cake! Here are pictures… including Izzy’s reaction shot to this deliciousness in her mouth…

 

 

Now that he had an open whiskey barrel, we put our Scotch Ale from a few weeks ago in there to age. The Scotch Ale by itself seems a little on the lighter side from most Scotch Ale recipes due to our attenuation probably being in the 60-70% range where Elevation 66’s equipment helps them to get in the 80% range… but still a very delicious, full flavored beer… and now it gets the barrel aging treatment. Here are some more pictures of that…

 

Lastly, we also transferred our Cactus Milk Stout to secondary fermentation… and this looks and smells like it’s going to be a truly delicious beer…

 

Anyway, that was our Easter weekend… oddly enough no deviled eggs, but I’ll be sure to bring that up for this weekend… or maybe a random breakfast. Hope you all had a wonderful time with your families or at least just having fun! Have a great day everybody!!!

Dr Homebrew & Prison Shakespeare

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

 

So the other nights, Izzy had to watch an Italian movie for her class (almost graduated) and she had a list to choose from… but only 2-3 were on Netflix, so we chose a movie called “Caesar Must Die” which was about Italian prisoners who put on a performance of Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar” during their incarceration. Now, this was billed as a documentary… but the details are a little shady as… if you’re watching it, the movie looks like it’s a legit movie with real actors, lighting, camera angles, etc. Basically, my understanding from checking the internet is… the movie is staged, scripted & shot like a film… but the majority of the actors were real prisoners in an Italian maximum security prison (with cells bigger than my apartment, but I digress) so it’s… kind of a documentary, but not really? Anyway, the movie is only about 72 minutes long, so it’s a good, quick one… and it’s actually very interesting. It’s interesting how these very proud Italian men take to this story of their Roman heritage, as told by one of the great English writers, and the parallels in that story with what happened to some of them… and how some of the decisions made in both realms are come to… and overall, it’s just really well acted & I really enjoyed it. I highly recommend checking it out if this sounds at all interesting… and trust me, it sounds a thousand times better than other Italian movies that we had to choose from.

  

Sunday night, Izzy & I watched a movie that I had never seen before… and being a fan of good horror movies, Izzy couldn’t believe it. The movie was 1979 horror classic “The Amityville Horror” starring James Brolin (Mr. Streisand) & Margot Kidder (not the 2005 remake starring Ryan Reynolds or the slew of other movies that threw ‘Amityville’ in the title to get watched accidentally). It’s the classic tale of a young family (husband, wife, 2.3 children) who move into a house where a year earlier, there was a gruesome murder where a young man killed his parents & four young siblings in a fit of rage. Well, apparently that greatly affected the resell value, so this young family moves in on a bargain… and soon find out (I think it’s over the course of the first three weeks they’re in the house) that the house is A) Haunted; B) Bloodthirsty; and C) Possibly a gateway to Hell. This movie was… what I found out by watching… basically the original that a LOT of movies borrowed a LOT from in regards to not only getting jump scares & establishing tone… but one of my favorite horror movies of all time “The Shining” came out a year later… and it’s pretty f**king similar… like, maybe Kubrick should’ve taken Take #4 instead of #37 on some of the scenes and released this a little earlier so he wasn’t accused or ripping this movie off by critics of the day. Regardless, the movie was pretty impressive… and if you haven’t seen this movie, you’ve probably seen some of the iconic images already in other things like the bleeding walls (referenced in “Ghostbusters”), father figure going crazy with an axe (“Shining”), flies signaling the presence of evil (“Poltergeist” & many others) or all of the above (Simpsons “Treehouse of Horror” #2 I believe). I highly recommend checking it out. Great flick… no wonder everybody wants to try to steal its thunder.

 

Also Sunday night, Izzy invited me to an event that she was helping out at for the Safe House for the Performing Arts in the Mid-Market area of downtown (corner of Crack & Cocaine?). Basically it’s a community group that rents space where available for various classes & projects that otherwise couldn’t be done in the area due to… well, ridiculous real estate costs. There were some great snacks, art being displayed, opportunities for writing & photography classes, and there were even some demonstrations by virtual artists & flamenco dancers… which I personally LOVE ever since my visit to Barcelona back in the day. Anyway, great event, great cause, here are some pictures…

 

Tuesday night, I also had the special opportunity to be part of the Brewing Network’s Dr. Homebrew podcast. Through the guild, the producers were looking to get a few in-house guests & I volunteered… that’s really about it… nothing like “Oh, we heard that you kicked ass at the Napa comp…” or anything like that. Then again, half of being successful is being there, right? Anyway, the podcast is actually done at The Hop Grenade Taproom in Concord, about 45 minutes away without traffic… but this was brought to my attention while at work… when Rush Hour was about to start the day of the show… so about a two hour drive later, I was in Concord… and checking out the taproom while I waited to pop my podcast guest cherry. First & foremost, the taproom is pretty legit. They have about 24 taps with a wide variety of local and national brews on tap so you can try a little bit of everything. There’s also a bottle room where they have even more to choose from… basically just about anything that you could be looking for in a beer, can probably be found there… or at least something similar. Here are some pictures…

 

 Beer Lacing - I see the United States in this one...

 

Then it was my time to set the internet on fire with my sexy voice… so the producer led me to their soundstage and I met the stars of the show (JP, Lee & Brian) and they gave me a quick run-through of the show and how to properly make sweet love to the microphone, etc. The concept of the Dr Homebrew podcast is there’s the MC named JP who kinda leads the show & operates the equipment… and then Lee & Brian are two master BJCP judges who break down styles of beers sent in by homebrewers from all over the world… and in my case, who are willing to bring them in personally… and then they’ll break down how their beer would be scored by the BJCP standards, whether it’s a good/great beer, and offer a few tips to make it better the next time around so that you can take your brewing to the next level. Of course, along the way, they also make a few jokes, have a few laughs & just have a good time talking about beer with their bros (and I assume broads from time to time). I had only heard about it a few days prior, but the two episodes that I listened to beforehand where pretty helpful, so I was obviously intrigued.

 

Anyway, they invited me in… and I brought my offering… my newly bottled Raptor Red!!! The information they were about to provide would be very useful as… well, because it was newly bottled, I hadn’t really tasted the finished product yet. It hasn't been posted yet, but you can listen to the entire episode HERE!!! If you’d like… and it’s free of charge. I think it'll be Episode #44 or #45. Basically they did a quick intro, and then we poured a sample for each of us… and then they break down everything from the appearance (absolutely gorgeous, clear red ale if I say so myself), malt & hop characteristics, head retention, possibly brewing errors, tastes that seem out of place for the style, all of that. Granted, we weren’t making this beer to the specific styles that’s in the BJCP guidelines… as we were really making a beer that we’d love… but there were definitely some flaws in the beer as we were tasting it… and offered me some great pointers on how to make the next batch better that I’ll definitely try. I also got to stick around, crack some wise, throw in some questions that I thought the listeners might want to know (not just myself) & also got to try this wonderful imperial stout that a gentleman named Garrett sent in from Minnesota and… damn… it was just fantastic. Kudos to Garrett! Their scoring of his beer made me feel a LOT better about my low score… but it was definitely a great time! Hopefully they’ll invite me to come back when our Barrel Aged Imperial Stout is ready… or maybe whatever we make next. That’s right, I’m down for being a repeat guest… and with proper planning I can make it out to Concord a little easier too. Thanks for having me, guys!!!

 

Aside from that, it’s been a pretty relaxing weekend… still doing the smoothie thing. Obviously I’m not living exclusively on smoothies… but basically just replacing Mountain Dew with smoothies… and so far it’s been going great. I’ll keep you posted, but so far I’m recommending it. Fresh fruits & vegetables instead of high fructose corn syrup and… extreme? Not really sure what’s in Mountain Dew but I assume crack-cocaine has similar qualities. Anyway, have a great weekend everybody!!!